Simply, self-esteem refers to the complex mental states in which one views oneself. Self-esteem is the foundation for the construction of self-meaning, self-identity, self-image, and self-concepts. It is appreciation and likeness for yourself regardless of external factors.
There are numerous factors that can influence your self-esteem, including:
· Self-assurance
· Feeling of safety
· Identity
· Sense of belonging
· Feeling of capability
The evaluation of self that self-esteem permits is important to your mental and social welfare. Your self-esteem impacts your goals, personal dreams, emotional health, decision-making process, and social interactions with peers. Additionally, self-esteem impacts your motivation levels. Typically, if you have a high level of self-esteem, you have a healthy, optimistic view towards yourself which allows you to see your capabilities and can potentially encourage you to take on new obstacles. A high level of self-esteem can lead to advanced health and social behavior.
Anchor Therapy is a counseling center in Hoboken, NJ with psychotherapists specialized in helping children, teens, adults, and couples with anxiety, depression, relationship issues, trauma, and life transitions. Anchor Therapy is accepting new clients and is now providing in-person sessions and telehealth (video/phone) sessions to residents of New Jersey and New York.
If you have a high self esteem, you:
Have a deep comprehension of your abilities
Are able to sustain healthy relationships with others because you have a secure and healthy relationship with yourself
Recognize your needs and can accurately communicate this necessity
Have practical and suitable goals for yourself and your skills
At the extreme end, you may have an excessively high level of self-esteem. If you struggle with this, you may be overestimating your skillset without having the experience and expertise to triumph. You may feel entitled to success instead of viewing it as a measure to work towards. Relationship issues may arise if you have high self-esteem. Lastly, you may bar yourself from self-improvement because you view yourself as virtually flawless.
If you have a low level of self-esteem, you may feel unsure about your capabilities and may even question your ability to make decisions. Also, you may not feel worthy of your aspirations, so you fail to go after them. That is to say, you feel unmotivated due to your low level of self-esteem. You may additionally experience complications with your social relationships and voicing your needs. Coupled with your low self-esteem, you may feel a low level of confidence which can make you falsely believe that you are unlovable and/or undeserving.
Unlike high self-esteem, inferior self-esteem is associated with a wide range of mental disorders and social complications, such as:
Internalizing problems:
Depression
Suicidal tendencies (Feeling suicidal? Help is only a phone call away at the free National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 800-273-8255)
Eating disorders
Anxiety
Externalizing problems:
Violence
Substance abuse
A comprehension of self-esteem and its effects are essential to enhance your health. So, what exactly influences self-esteem?
1. Community Involvement Affects Self-Esteem
Your self-esteem plays an integral role in your community involvement. More specifically, self-esteem is crucial for adolescents’ community and school engagement. As a mediating role, self-esteem is important in the connection between school engagement and low depression levels. Involvement in extracurricular activities assists in lessening teens’ depressive symptoms. Sport involvement on behalf of adolescents has a positive indirect effect on decreased depressive symptoms via self-esteem. The volunteering activity of teens reduces the likelihood for developing depression through school engagement and self-esteem. Generally, female teens have lower levels of self-esteem in comparison to their male teen counterparts, but higher levels of school engagement.
Generally, self-esteem seems to be low during your childhood. As you become a teen and grow into adulthood, your self-esteem improves. This increase eventually enters a generally secure and long-lasting level. Likewise, as you mature, your personality traits stabilize. In other words, as your personality reaches a steady state, your self-esteem follows suit.
2. The Impact of Social Media on Self-Esteem
It is commonly known that social media influences one’s self-esteem. Social networking sites, like Facebook and Instagram, may be beneficial in that they allow you to connect with others and witness diverse viewpoints; however, there is a negative aspect to this relationship.
As human beings, we have a need to compare ourselves to others to:
Assess the self
Make decisions
Regulate emotions
Gain motivation
Upward comparison can be beneficial when it motivates you to make positive lifestyle alterations but, more often than not, it causes people to feel insufficient which leads to low self-esteem. Social media platforms have dramatically impacted the social worlds of everyone who has access to the technology. Constant users of social networking sites experience harmful effects on their self-esteem due to upward comparison. Therefore, moving forward, you should be mindful about the negative aspects of frequent social media use.
3. The Connection Between Self-Esteem and Social Relationships
Typically, self-esteem and social relationships have been analyzed cross-sectionally, which means the direction of their relationship cannot be inferred. Regardless, research has concluded a reciprocal association between the two.
Self-esteem influences the following in relationships:
Closeness
Intimacy
Support
Satisfaction
A positive relationship was found between self-esteem and satisfaction with social relationships. These effects can particularly be witnessed in long-term relationships. Fluctuations in satisfaction with relationships impacts self-esteem rather than the reverse.
Now that you know what factors impact self-esteem, how can you take steps to feel better about yourself?
1. Pinpoint Upsetting Conditions – Consider what conditions are puncturing your self-esteem. Triggers may encompass:
A personal crisis
An alteration in life circumstances
A fight with a loved one
2. Be Conscious of Your Thoughts – Once an upsetting condition is identified, reflect on your thoughts regarding the situation. How are you interpreting the situation? Your thoughts may be:
Rational
Irrational
Positive
Negative
Impartial
3. Question Negative Thoughts – If your thoughts are negative, try to challenge them. Be cognizant of inaccuracies in your thinking. Since it can be difficult to identify these inaccuracies by yourself, it is highly suggested that you reach out to a licensed mental health counselor who can assist you.
4. Change Your Thoughts – Finally, you can replace your negative thoughts with positive thoughts. You can do this by:
Employing optimistic statements
Forgiving yourself
Highlighting the positive
Low self-esteem has the ability to negatively impact your life, but it does not have to. By working with a licensed mental health therapist and employing the tactics outlined in this article, you can enhance your self-esteem.
For additional information, please view the following sources:
Bailey J. A., 2nd (2003). The foundation of self-esteem. Journal of the National Medical Association, 95(5), 388–393.
Bang, Hyejin, Won, Doyeon & Park, Sanghyun. (2020). School engagement, self-esteem, and depression of adolescents: The role of sport participation and volunteering activity and gender differences. Children and Youth Services Review, 113.
de Moor EL, Denissen JJA, Emons WHM, Bleidorn W, Luhmann M, Orth U, Chung JM. Self-esteem and satisfaction with social relationships across time. J Pers Soc Psychol. 2021 Jan;120(1):173-191.
Harris, Michelle A & Orth, Ulrich. (2020). The link between self-esteem and social relationships: A meta-analysis of longitudinal studies. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 119, 1459-1477.
Mann, Michal & Hosman, Clemens & Schaalma, Herman & Vries, Nanne. (2004). Self-esteem in a broad-spectrum approach for mental Health promotion. Health education research.19. 357-72.
Self-esteem: Take steps to feel better about yourself. (2020, July 14). Mayo Clinic.
Vogel, E. A., Rose, J. P., Roberts, L. R., & Eckles, K. (2014). Social comparison, social media, and self-esteem. Psychology of Popular Media Culture, 3(4), 206–222.
Victoria Scala
is an intern at Anchor Therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey. She is currently an undergraduate student at the Honors College of Rutgers University-Newark, looking to study Clinical Mental Health Counseling at the graduate level. As an intern at Anchor Therapy, Victoria is committed to producing content for and managing the office’s social media presence and blog.
