*Spoilers ahead for Netflix’s documentary Stutz!*
This past November, actor Jonah Hill premiered a documentary centered around his beloved therapist, Phil Stutz. At the beginning of the film the viewer was to be convinced this was one session filmed during one day. It is then revealed that the documentary was filmed over the course of two years because Hill felt he was not getting what he wanted from the film. After this is revealed, Hill confesses that, in order for the film to be the hit he knows it can be, they both need to be more vulnerable.
With their guards down, they both begin to highlight the mental health tools Stutz (the therapist) has taught Hill (the patient) during his struggles with anxiety and depression. The film is raw and showcases not only the professional relationship Stutz and Hill have formed, but also the friendship they have made. The two have formed a mutualistic friendship in which Hill benefits from Stutz’s guidance, and Stutz has gained a caring friend that keeps him company in his somewhat-isolated life.
Anchor Therapy is a counseling center in Hoboken, NJ with mental health therapists specialized in helping children, teens, adults, and couples with anxiety, depression, relationship issues, trauma, life transitions, and more. Anchor Therapy is accepting new clients and is now providing in-person sessions and teletherapy sessions to residents of New Jersey, New York, Florida, North Carolina, and Utah.
The Background of Jonah Hill
Jonah Hill has been in the public eye since 2004 when he began acting in college. From there, Hill’s fame grew and he starred in numerous hit films such as, War Dogs, 21 Jump Street, 22 Jump Street, The Wolf of Wall Street, and so on. With all of this success, one would think Hill felt on top of the world. However, Hill felt that he was dependent upon his success since it dictated his mental health. He falsely thought that the more he worked and the more fame he gained, the happier he would be. The need for constant work forced Hill’s mental health on the back burner and allowed him to misconcept his mental health issues. He was pushing his anxiety and depression down which, ultimately, led to years of panic attacks and low self esteem.
Hill also struggled with growing up overweight as a child and in the early stages of his acting career as well. He constantly had a negative view on himself. When he did start working out and tried to lose weight, he himself took notice but so did the media. The media constantly highlighted Hill’s weight which was extremely personal to him.
If you struggle with negative self-talk, read our blog: “Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for Negative Self-Talk.”
The Background of Therapist Phil Stutz
Phil Stutz grew up in Manhattan and suffered some trauma himself. He grew up with an outgoing father and a mother that preferred to be alone and expressed her hatred towards men due to her father’s abusive past. Stutz’s younger brother, Eddy, was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer and, eventually, passed at the age of three which sent the whole family into a spiral of denial and only made the family dynamic worse, which eventually led to Stutz’s parents getting divorced.
If someone you know is struggling with grief, read our blog “How To Support Someone Who Is Grieving.”
Due to these life transitions, Stutz grew up being a therapist for his family as they ranted about most of their problems to him. Later on in life, at around the age of 50, Stutz was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease. Parkinson’s is a brain disorder that causes unintended or uncontrollable movements, such as shaking, stiffness, and difficulty with balance and coordination. Even with this diagnosis, Stutz continued on with his therapeutic career and was determined to spread his mental health tools and knowledge to clients like Hill.
What Are Stutz’s Mental Health Tools?
Hill and Stutz dive into all the factors in our life that try to hold us down and, effectively, trap us to make us feel stuck in life. They also highlight the tools Stutz has created that can have an immediate effect on your mood.
The tools that can impact your mood and counteract barriers include:
Your Life Force- Your relationship with your body, others, and yourself
String of Pearls- Choosing to find motivation from events that happen in your life
Finding your shadow- Getting in touch with the part of yourself that makes you feel at your lowest
Active Love- Turning your hatred towards others into love (counteracts being stuck in The Maze)
Radical Acceptance- Learn from the events in our lives and find the meaning of them
The Grateful Flow- Recognizing what we are grateful for (counteracts the Black Cloud)
The barriers that make us feel stuck in life include:
Part X- The judgmental and anti-social parts of oneself
Three Aspects of Reality - Pain, uncertainty, constant work
The Snapshot- An illusion people create of themselves that they think will be their true form of happiness
The Maze- Not growing so you feel stuck in the same place
The Black Cloud- The negative energy
Learn More About These Specific Barriers and Tools That Can Help Your Mental Health:
Your Life Force
Before Stutz had his own private practice, he worked for a group therapy center. He recalls not being satisfied with his clients’ treatment plan because they left the same way they felt coming in. He begged his supervisors for ways he could help create an immediate change in his clients’ life. While searching, Stutz created the life force which consists of three different levels, in a pyramid formation.
Level One - Your relationship with your physical body:
Stutz ensures this bottom layer is 85 percent of the work.
It includes getting your body moving while:
Performing mindful exercise
Engaging in diet habits
Getting better sleep habits
Hill shares that, as a kid, when he was told to exercise and diet he immediately thought “Okay something is wrong with how you look” and this could not be linked to your mental health. Once Hill was able to incorporate level one into his mental health regimine, he was able to understand how this is the base level to feeling better. When he decided to exercise, it got his body moving and became motivation to even help get him out of the bed in the morning. Hill understands that, if exercise was presented differently to him as a child, he would not have grown to hate working out and eating a well-balanced diet. This persistence of being told he needed to work out as a child from his mother only harmed his relationship with her and his own mental health. As an adult, Hill was able to gain a positive view of movement with Stutz’s presentation of how exercise, diet, and sleep can help your mental health.
If you are interested in learning more about how working out can impact your mental health, check out our blog: “5 Ways Exercise Benefits Your Mental Health.”
2. Level Two - Your relationship with others:
The middle level of the pyramid is your relationship with others. Stutz says that relationships with others are like hand holds. When we enter a depressive episode, we push people away and take a step back from life. He says, in order to improve those relationships, we have to take the initiative and pull people back in. Being around people will affect you in a positive way. It represents you taking the initiative and telling yourself, I want to be surrounded by people and pull them in not push them away.
3. Level Three - Your relationship with yourself:
This top tier includes coming into a relationship with your unconsciousness. This would mean activating your unconscious. A trick Stutz uses is writing down your thoughts to reflect what is going on in your unconscious mind. This could include writing in a journal or, under Stutz’s recommendation, he has his clients draw the tools he describes on an index card so they can physically picture them.
Once someone begins to work on these aspects of their life force, they begin to find their passion. From using this pyramid, Stutz believes everything can start to fall into place.
The Negative: Part X
Part X is the name Stutz gave to the judgmental and anti-social parts of oneself. Part X wants to keep you from changing and blocks the potential for you to grow. Part X grows when people try to avoid the three aspects of reality.
These three aspects of reality are:
Pain
Uncertainty
Constant Work
These realities can be temporarily defeated but, it is important to realize, they still are there and we still can grow with these aspects in our life. Part X will always be there and, without it, we are unable to grow. Going through the process of overcoming parts of Part X is where the satisfaction can come from since we can learn that we can move on with life even when we encounter the three aforementioned aspects.
String of Pearls
Stutz is extremely vocal about insisting that we must keep going in life and you should tell yourself, “I am the one that puts the next pearl on the string.” The string of pearls is a tool Stutz created to help with motivation. Each pearl equals one action. As you are placing these pearls on the string, you should notice every event has the same value. No matter if the event in your life is good or bad, it is significant for you to take control and see you are the person that puts the pearls on the string so you can control what you chose to do.
In addition, Stutz adds that inside every pearl there is a dark circle or, in Stutz’s humorous terms, a turd. The turd represents the imperfect part of the pearl since no event or action could be perfect. Stutz says do not worry about the turd but worry about moving forward and placing the next pearl. Hill has taken his own view on the string of pearls and sees that every turd has a pearl surrounding it. This basically means that you should try to find the good in negative events in your life and how you can learn to move forward from this situation.
Hill’s Shadow
Your shadow is the image that you have of yourself linked to poor self-esteem. This image is what you chose to hide from the world, also known as the part of yourself you are embarrassed of. Everyone has a shadow and those shadows are unique to that person but, in basic terms, everyone's shadows are the same since they are the part they are ashamed of. To get rid of his shadow, Hill thought his success would erase the negative view he had on himself and tried to ignore his shadow. This was counteractive since Hill was avoiding his self-image instead of facing the problem head on.
Stutz steps to connecting with your shadow:
See and focus on your shadow. Visualize a time in your life when you felt inferior. The part of you that you wish you were not but cannot get rid of. For Hill, this was his 14 year old self that was overweight and had low self esteem.
What do you do with that image in the present? Talk to the shadow and see how that shadow feels about you and how you treated it. Then, see the answer. The shadow craves attention and wants to be recognized. Hill says his shadow is mad at him for being repressed for so long.
What can you do to make up for not paying attention to the shadow? The answer to this question is to include and share the shadow in your life. This will help make a better relationship with the shadow instead of treating the shadow like the enemy. When this relationship is formed, it can help with shyness. This could help you in high pressure situations such as giving presentations, taking an exam, and so on.
When using these three steps, the goal is to tolerate whatever may happen. If you are content with your shadow, you can work towards being content with your true self which will make others’ opinions matter less. The process of constantly relating to the shadow and paying attention to it will create a sense of wholeness.
The Snapshot
The snapshot is an illusion people create of themselves that they think will be their true form of happiness. It is the image of the perfect experience someone wishes to have in their life and they think it is the answer to solving their problems. The problem is this is only an image and it is still- there is no movement. The person becomes so fascinated with this snapshot that it becomes crippling. You may fail to realize that even when you reach this snapshot that the three aspects of reality will still not go away. Once you realize that your snapshot is not what you thought it would be, it could make the depressive feeling even worse. If someone you know is struggling with depression, our blog “3 Ways To Support Someone With Depression” is a must-read.
Hill’s snapshot was a successful career that included losing weight and fitting more into society's standards. Once he garnered success and his dream body, he was not feeling the satisfaction of what he thought achieving the snapshot would feel like. Therefore, this only made him more depressed. On top of that, the media would not leave him alone and made sure they gave their opinion on his weight. Hill wanted to be out of the public eye but the reality was that, no matter if he gained or lost weight, the media would always have a comment to make on his appearance. Stutz tells Hill that the snapshot is unhealthy and it just allows others’ opinions about his lifestyle in moments he wishes to be happy to turn negative.
Hill and His Mother’s Relationship
As mentioned before, Hill’s relationship with his mother was rocky when he was younger. When Hill’s mom joined in on the film and sat down with Stutz and Hill, they were able to discuss some of the reasons for the arguments they had during his childhood. Sharon, Hill’s mother, grew up being the larger one of her family, so she also grew up being told to lose weight as well by her mother and sister. This anxiety Sharon had was then reflected on to her parenting of Hill as she also pushed him to lose weight. This made Hill view his mother as non-accepting which then translated into how he thought other women viewed him.
As an adult male in his 30s, Hill is now able to see where his mother was coming from and how the way she was raised had an effect on how she raised him. This conversation between Hill and Sharon allowed both of them to see different sides of the story, recognizing that life is not just black and white. Stutz dives deeper into this and tells both Hill and Sharon to now move on from the past and voice what they both need now in their relationship to continue to grow.
The Maze
Being stuck in the Maze is a result of Product X. You are not growing and you feel stuck in the same place. The difference with the Maze is that it involves other people. Stutz created the idea of the Maze from his mother’s inability to forgive her father and erase her negative stigma of men. Stutz’s grandfather on his mom’s side was abusive towards everyone in her family but her which was extremely confusing to her as a child. He then packed up and left during the height of the Great Depression. Stutz recalls, 40 years after he left, his grandfather had sent his mother a letter reaching out. Stutz’s mom did not even care to respond since she still had so much hatred towards her father and men in general. According to Stutz, his mom has been stuck in the Maze for over 40 years.
When someone hurts you and you choose not to move on from it, they take up most of your focus. You constantly talk and think about them. You decide “I will get over it once this person apologizes and then I can move on in my life”. This is when you become trapped in the Maze and this will put your life on hold. This is seen in Stutz’s mom when she turned her hatred for her father onto other men and, in time, pushed her feelings onto her son and husband. To get out of the Maze, you need to gain balance in your life and perform the exercise of Active Love.
The Steps of Active Love
Close your eyes. Visualize a universe that is completely made up of love.
Absorb all of that love and make yourself the leader of love.
Send all that love towards the person you are angry with. Hold nothing back and feel all that love entering that person's body.
If you struggle with anger, read our blog “The Most Important Things You Need To Know About Anger Management” for support.
When you feel that person receiving all that love, you have become one with them. Once you are able to become one with the person you are angry at, you can become one with anyone. Having this ability creates a sense of mastery and will make you feel whole which can relinquish you from the Maze.
Radical Acceptance
Radical Acceptance is when we learn from the events in our lives and find the meanings of them. Stutz says we need to squeeze the juice out of lemon which means you, not only have the will to do this and move on in life, but also have faith in finding something else that is valuable. This will bring light to the meaningful items already in your life and help you find new ones as well.
Hill reflects using this when he found himself having trouble falling asleep one night before filming. Instead of stressing about not getting enough sleep and getting himself more wound up, he chose to take that time and create more ideas for the film. He turned that time he spent awake into meaning and pushed it towards benefitting the film and him.
The Black Cloud
Part X constantly wants to keep the negative energy flowing in your life. With this constant flow of negative energy a cloud forms over your head which Stutz calls “the Black Cloud.” This cloud makes it hard to see the sunshine which symbolizes the positive in life. In order to see the sunshine, we need to think of things in our life that we are grateful for. This brings in the grateful flow.
Steps to penetrate the Black Cloud:
Close your eyes
Say two to four things you are grateful for out loud
Add more things and say them in your head to create a stream
Now, you feel that you are going to create another grateful thought but you don't. You just want to simply feel the force that would create a grateful thought
This will allow you to be taken over by gratefulness. The idea of the grateful flow is to not only recognize the good things we have in our lives, but to also gain satisfaction from going through the process. Stutz says this process is good to use when your thoughts are everywhere because this can help slow them down since you are being more intentional and focused.
Both Stutz and Honah created an extremely vulnerable film that lists numerous tools to help battle anxiety and depression. When someone with a platform, such as Hill, comes forward with these very real problems he faces everyday, it helps people see that you can still struggle with your mental health even if you are rich and famous.
Even Stutz, who has created these tools and helps others deal with their mental health on a daily basis, still finds himself struggling with negative thoughts about his brother’s death, the divorce of his parents, and his disease. Hill states, “It is good for people to notice people that we look up to are not exempt from the problems we have. You are still in the struggle and the fight of being a human just like everyone else is.” By creating this film, Hill is able to share the tools he learned with thousands of other people. He loves these tools that have allowed him to have a better life, and he knows that they will help you too.
If you are finding yourself feeling depressed or anxious like Hill, please do not hesitate to reach out to Anchor Therapy today.
Sophia Richmond
is an undergraduate student at the University of Delaware studying Human Services with a concentration in Administration and Family Policy. Sophia wants to continue her education and attend graduate school, hoping to work with teens struggling with self esteem, mental health, and eating disorders. She also has an interest in social media and hopes to grow her resume in that area.
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