Spoilers ahead for 2023 film Barbie!
In the new popular film Barbie, Barbie is malfunctioning, something she has never experienced before. She is unhappy with her new appearance and the raw emotions she is beginning to experience. Barbie tries to resist the changes she is going through, although these life alterations are unavoidable. Despite the fact she is comfortable with her old life and perfect routine, she begins to acknowledge that by embracing her changes, it is essential to alter standards and ideas that require improvement.
For a college student, there are numerous changes that you will go through. You will be making new friends and losing others, challenged with managing your time efficiently, accepting responsibility, meeting higher expectations, and so much more. Although it may seem daunting now, these changes will challenge your way of thinking and allow you to expand into the person you want to be.
Anchor Therapy is a counseling center in Hoboken, NJ with mental health therapists specialized in helping children, teens, adults, couples, and families with anxiety, depression, relationship issues, trauma, life transitions, and more. Anchor Therapy is accepting new clients and is now providing in-person sessions and teletherapy sessions to residents of New Jersey, New York, Florida, North Carolina, and Utah.
Why can insecurity be your biggest enemy?:
Insecurity, especially at this time of your life in college, can lead to isolating yourself by avoiding social interactions. Insecurity is natural and bound to happen. However, with the help of life transition counseling, you can learn ways to work through these feelings and be proactive when these feelings arise in the future. In the movie, Margo Robbie plays the “Stereotypical Barbie,” a doll version representing society's beauty standard. Once Barbie begins to change, her insecurities get the best of her, and she is consumed with the conception of not being good enough. A lesson from this is that no matter how perfect others view you, your insecurities may obstruct your personal view. During transitions, fear, excitement, anxiety, and self-doubt are completely normal and often generate insecurities you may be having. It is essential to ask for help before these negative thoughts and doubts create an outstanding issue.
Possible effects of unrealistic beauty standards on college students:
Body dysmorphia (If you are struggling with body dysmorphia, read our blog “How to Overcome Body Image Issues”)
Decreased self-esteem
Anxiety
Social isolation
Shame
Mood disorders
Suicidal thoughts (If you are having suicidal thoughts, you can call the National Suicide Hotline at 988.)
Self-hatred
Lack of engaging in social activities
Difficulty acknowledging positive qualities in oneself
Where do I fit in as a college student?
We all have the desire to fit in. The constant fear of being judged by others and the natural inclination to belong is something that we all have struggled with or are currently experiencing. We often assume that we will be happier and have more friends if we fit in. But do you have to adjust yourself to adhere to the expectations of others? Do we suppress our own morals and beliefs just because they may be contrasting to another? This is a question that may be troublesome to answer on our own.
How Life Transition Counseling Can Help
However, life transition counseling can help you navigate what you may be struggling with and help you with these transition questions. This form of therapy can guide you in clarifying your values and goals and how to accomplish these desires. The most important thing about this therapy is that you feel you are being understood and encouraged. There will be no judgment about the decisions you have made in the past or the current circumstances you are in right now. Instead, validate your questions and provide an approach to help you navigate this transition complimentary. For additional information on managing life transitions, read our blog “The Best Ways To Cope with Life Transitions.”
Signs you may be struggling with change as a college student:
Trouble sleeping (If you are having trouble sleeping, read our blog, “9 Tips to Getting Better Sleep.”
Low energy/motivation
Having difficulty with school
Increase/decrease in appetite
Feeling like you “have to” go home
Overly longing for friends and family
Increased use of substances such as drugs or alcohol
Lack of interest
Crying often
Jittery
Feelings of irritability
Neglecting hygiene
Feeling exhausted constantly
What can I do to make the college transition easier?
Firstly, getting enough sleep is important for your mental and physical health. Sleep affects your decision-making, adaptability, productivity, and learning outcomes in college. To have a higher GPA and positively go through this transition, you need to be in the right headspace; inadequate sleep dramatically affects this. Giving yourself time to make college friends or choose a major doesn't happen instantly. Don't hesitate to get involved around campus; this can help you make friends and find what may interest you. It is important to put yourself out there; if you are ready, you will learn a lot about yourself and possibly resolve an issue you were worried about, such as making friends. Recognize that it is expected for you to feel homesick, although you may be excited to start to begin this new chapter of life. Staying in touch with your family and friends is essential, but relying on them and calling or texting too much can restrict you from adjusting to this change and prevent you from advancing in your environment. Equally important, using your time favorably helps to avoid burnout. Many things, such as clubs, on-campus activities or jobs, academics, social life, and downtime, may require your time and attention.
Making sure that you are organized and on track may help with procrastination and feeling like you are overwhelmed. Allow yourself to indulge in this environment and break out of your comfort zone. People don't want to make mistakes or have regrets, but those experiences are what help you grow the most. Sometimes, the regret of not doing something over doing something and it not going the way you had anticipated is better. It is normal to feel conflicted when maybe you didn’t do or act a certain way previously in life but are now because you are changing, which is normal.
Expectations of Being a Woman in College
Barbie is meant to be perfect. The doll has no cellulite, perfect blonde hair, petite waist, and doesn't have the consequential thoughts women in the real world possess. Once Barbie enters the real world, she notices the negativity, harmful expectations, and standards women have to live up to. Although Barbie was once “perfect,” she acknowledges the difficulties of being a woman and the unattainable expectations society and men project onto women. In college, it can be challenging not to compare yourself to others. The term “Freshman 15” also creates a sigma regarding college girls, sometimes resulting in stress-related eating disorders.
College girls are ridiculed by men and other women. There is an increased amount of jealousy, whether it is boy-related, if you are in Greek life and scrutinize which one you may have gotten into, if you go out too much or too little, if you are single and hang out with a lot of guys or are in a relationship. A line from the Barbie movie that portrays the struggles of being a woman is, “You have to never get old, never be rude, never show off, never be selfish, never fall down, never fail, never show fear, never get out of line. It’s too hard!” In college, you can't do certain things you did in high school because you need to act more mature, but in reality, this is new territory, and college doesn’t come with a rule book. So, if there is one thing to take away from the Barbie movie as a college girl, it is this: you are beautiful no matter what, and your weight does not define your worth.
Why is comparison and fear of missing out so prevalent in college girls?
Comparison is bound to happen in life. In college, girls tend to compare themselves to others and focus on what they should be doing to make themselves appear one way rather than focusing on what they have now that sets them apart from the crowd. Along with that, fear of missing out (FOMO) is very common among college students. Oftentimes, this is brought on by your friends going out without you, not getting invited to a party, or obsessing over social media and comparing your life to what someone else may be doing that you are not. College students are surrounded by others doing different things than them, and it can often seem as if you aren't doing enough or that not going to that one party will affect you for the rest of college. The result of FOMO can significantly affect your mental and physical health. Stress and anxiety have an immediate effect and contribute to inadequate emotional, cognitive, and physical health. The desire to do more or compare yourself to others is inevitable. This happens during a life transition such as college, but limiting social media use and finding ways to stop yourself from comparing to others is essential.
Tips for coping with life transitions as a college student:
Time management
Creating a daily schedule, prioritizing coursework, and setting reasonable time limits to avoid overworking yourself are essential.
Accept that change is expected
Reframing your thinking by identifying what emotions and changes you may be going through.
Express thoughts and feelings
Avoiding being judgemental of yourself and instead redirecting these thoughts into an outlet such as journaling or practicing positive affirmations may help express feelings.
Build a support system
Utilize online resources, volunteer on campus, attend events, join an organization, or apply for an on-campus job.
Exercise
Exercise produces endorphins, improves sleep quality, and reduces stress levels.
Preparation
It encourages relaxation, success, and confidence while decreasing stress levels.
Establish small goals
Over time, you will feel more motivated because you will be less overwhelmed.
Establish a routine
It helps us feel more secure when tasks are predictable and integrated into our daily routine.
Practice self-care habits
It assists mental and physical health; it may increase energy levels, lower stress, and reduce the risk of illness.
Meditation
It can produce a sense of peace and balance that will benefit your overall health and emotional welfare.
Art
Provides meaning and a deeper understanding of our world and society.
Yoga
Provides calmness and clarity of mind. Yoga increases body awareness, eases the mind, enhances concentration, and captures attention.
Breathing techniques
Increase oxygen levels, decrease stress, lower blood pressure, and promote relaxation.
Acknowledge and prioritize positive aspects of your life
Helps improve self-esteem, reduce anxiety, and promote productivity.
How life transition counseling could have helped Barbie:
Life transition counseling can make a considerable difference in anyone's life, especially for college students. The benefits of life transition counseling provide a supportive and safe environment necessary to explore feelings and challenges you may be experiencing right now. Utilizing coping skills provided through this form of counseling can provide various ways to manage your stress and questions you may be currently having.
Life transition counseling can not only help you, but Barbie as well. Barbie was faced with the option of either trying to get back to her original self, although everything around her had changed or living in the real world with humans, both of which are contradictory to each other. To make this life-altering decision, life transition counseling could have provided her with support and insight on how to evaluate her choices and maneuver around what she could and couldn't control. By working with a therapist who has knowledge about life transitions, you not only can receive the help you need but also receive an unbiased outside perspective. Ultimately providing you with accepting and working through emotions while also identifying what experiences could impact you and influence a negative mindset. This will allow you to discover possible solutions and coping skills to use to your advantage to grow as an individual.
Therapy focused on life transitions can benefit anyone at any age, especially college students. Identifying the emotions you may be experiencing is essential; there is a great deal of confusion and homesickness during this transition. You are on your own, and the options are endless; you are free to express yourself in any way. Self-doubt is bound to happen; transitions are things that we are not yet accustomed to, which can often make us feel vulnerable without knowing what may happen. The good news is that life transition-focused therapy can help you. You are not alone during this transition; with additional guidance and support, you may navigate this transition more comfortably. The Barbie movie taught us to empower ourselves and follow our instincts even though we may need help along the way.
Addison Selzer
is an Intern at Anchor Therapy. She is an undergraduate student at the University of Delaware studying Human Development and Family Sciences with a concentration in Clinical Services. Upon graduating undergrad, she is looking to pursue a graduate and doctorate degree in Clinical Psychology with the goal of becoming a therapist.
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