A lot of our clients find themselves giving away too much of themselves to others to a point that they feel worn out. Especially in this time during the holidays, people feel they need to give everything they can to others. Whether that is lending an ear to friends in need, giving gifts, or going above and beyond for others. If you find yourself doing to this to the point of exhaustion then you may be a people-pleaser. This usually means that you are taking care of others around you before you take care of yourself. Our clients who present as people-pleasers usually find themselves feeling anxious, drained, and overwhelmed.
Planning a wedding can be both the best time of your life and the most stressful time of your life. There are always stressors that arise when wedding planning that you don’t expect and it is impossible to predict. When planning a wedding, it is about your love for your partner who you are planning to spend the rest of your life with. But it is also a momentous day that your families and friends feel apart of. This is usually where the stress stems from. You will notice over the course of wedding planning that everyone around you has their own vision and expectation for your wedding. It is important to stay on track with you and your partner’s vision for your wedding and to have a few coping tools in your back pocket for when the stress really starts to build.
Most people who experience anxiety over analyze everything happening in their life constantly. People with anxiety are either over analyzing something that happened in the past or they are worried about what might happen in the future. A common example of a worry is about future plans. People who experience anxiety are more likely to cancel their plans last minute because they are spending so much of their time stuck worrying.
Whether you have anxiety yourself, or you know someone who has anxiety, then it would be helpful to learn more about anxiety and how it can sometimes present as not caring for others and not wanting to be social. but that is not what is actually going on. When people with anxiety cancel plans last minute, there is usually much more going on.
The school year is in full swing and a lot of students are starting to feel the pressure of their school work weigh on them. School anxiety is very common for students who put a lot of pressure on themselves to do things perfectly. When they do not feel like they are doing things perfectly, they can get stuck in one place. They then start to over analyze and perfect everything. Since there is no such thing as perfection, these students usually start to fall behind in their school work. Usually being behind in school work will increase anxious feelings and then this cycle continues throughout the school year.
Whether you’re a student, a working professional, or a stay-at-home parent, you need to take breaks. Taking a break can look differently for each person. the overall goal is to stop doing whatever you’re doing long enough that you feel re-energized when you return to it. That’s why employers give you paid time off (PTO) and sick time. That’s why there are things called, “study breaks”. And that’s why there’s a saying, “come back to it when you can”. When taking breaks, there could be a lot of feelings that arise such as guilt as a break could feel like a waste of time and unproductive. I will discuss why this is not actually the case.
With the end of summer, comes the beginning of a new school year. a lot of teachers have a hard time transitioning back into school mode along with their students. It’s always a big change to go from a carefree summer to a stressful school year. There are so many different stressors that teachers experience throughout the school year. It’s extra important that they schedule in time for self-care throughout the school year. The best time to start a new self-care habit is at the beginning of a new routine. So it’s most helpful to start now.
I talk to my clients often about their sleeping habits in my Hoboken psychotherapy practice. Getting a good night’s sleep is a big part of our overall health. It is recommended that adults get 7-9 hours of sleep on average. Children, teens, and senior adults should be ideally getting more hours of sleep. Before we can work on feeling less anxious, or less depressed, we need to make sure our basic needs are met. This includes getting enough sleep so that you can be your best self. Some clients find it hard to fall asleep or stay asleep- especially if they’re feeling anxious, stressed, or overwhelmed. Below are some tips I give my clients to help them sleep better.
Career counseling is something that you can get from seeing a psychotherapist. Usually people who need help or guidance with their career path will turn to a business coach or a career coach. While a coach can definitely be helpful, they will not be able to sort through the emotional side of your decision making. They are not licensed professionals who can help decrease your stress during this process. As psychotherapists, we are trained to help our clients figure out not only their future goals but the best way that will get them there based on where they’re at currently. That usually looks different for each person.
![Life Of The Retired Athlete: How To Fight Depression And Anxiety]()
Professional athletes face a high risk of experiencing mental health issues including depression, anxiety, and substance abuse after they retire. The research shows that elite athletes spend most of their lives focused on perfecting themselves so that they can be the best of the best at their sport. There is usually a specific end goal of winning a championship or even an Olympic medal. Most athletes reach their peak at a young age and retire from their competitive sport early in life. Nowadays, there are a lot of opportunities for athletes to get a degree while pursuing their professional sport so that they are left with other options for a career when they retire. Most professional athletes are used to earning a large income and are given free perks throughout their career. They are used to receiving attention and are noticed by the public. Once they retire this may disappear. They may find it hard to keep up with the lifestyle they once had easy access to. IT can feel devastating to watch your social media follower number decrease over time. These are some factors that can contribute to a retired athlete to feel unfulfilled. This may lead to feelings of depression, anxiety, and they may turn to substance use to help mask these feelings.
![How CBT Can Treat Anxiety and Panic]()
As a psychotherapist located in Hoboken, NJ I specialize in helping clients with their anxiety and panic/anxiety attacks. There are different treatment modalities that therapists use to treat anxiety and panic. One old school way in which therapists were trained to treat anxiety was through Freudian thinking in which you use psychodynamic therapy to analyze and treat what happened in your past. However there is a lot of research that shows CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) is the most effective form of treatment for anxiety. I specialize in using CBT as I have seen the firsthand effects of this treatment. While it may be helpful for you to examine past patterns, relationships, trauma, and so on, you are usually looking to decrease your current anxious symptoms. If your anxiety and/or panic attacks are preventing you from living your best life NOW then you have to work on the present and future in therapy. CBT is a forward way of thinking in which we examine your recent and current thoughts so that in turn you will be able to lift your mood and your behaviors will get better.
As a psychotherapist in Hoboken, NJ who specializes in seeing lgbtq identified clients, I find that the coming out process never ends- no matter what age or how long ago you first came out. In hoboken and jersey city, there are a lot of accepting groups and people that welcome the lgbtq community. We are also so close to NYC that it makes sense for hudson county to be pretty liberal and accepting of all people- no matter how they identify. While I say I specialize in the LGBTQ community, I really mean that I am accepting of all people and I have experience working with people who identify as something they feel is different than the population “norm”. There are definitely unique hardships that accompany identifying as lgbtq, such as the coming out process. And that process never ends.
Senioritis is real. Most seniors, in high school and college, will feel it at some point of their senior year. Usually it is the second half of the year as they are approaching graduation. As a parent, it is good to be aware of senioritis as it can be confused as laziness, lack of motivation, or even depression symptoms (such as sadness, agitation, lack of energy, etc.). As the weather gets warmer, teens and students start to get the summer itch. This itch will be stronger for a senior as they feel the end of school is near. As a parent of a senior student, it is important to be aware of the signs of senioritis so that you know how to help your child.
What is mommy guilt? It is when a mom has a feeling of shame while away from her children. There is a feeling of FOMO (fear of missing out) while spending time away from your family. It could be that you’re at work, spending time with friends, traveling without your children, going on errands around town, a date with your partner, etc. Mommy guilt is a common feeling that most moms get, especially with a newborn. Mommy guilt can also be seen as a kind of anxious/nervous feeling that you cannot shake and always remains under the surface. Mommy guilt can stand in your way of the self-care that you need.
If you are a mom, or soon-to-be mom, then you have to watch Netflix’s new show, “Workin’ Moms”. As a warning The show has a lot of dry humor, but most moms find at least one character or incident extremely relatable. The show follows a few moms who are all working and balancing their family life, raising a newborn, and returning to work after maternity leave. As a psychotherapist who helps a lot of moms in Hoboken, NJ, there is one character that intrigued me the most. In the show she recently had a baby and is experiencing postpartum depression. This may be one of the most realistic portrayals of postpartum depression that I have seen on a TV show.
Everyone feels anxious at different points in their lives. If you find yourself feeling anxious, stressed, nervous, or on-edge most days then you are probably looking to make a change. If you find that your anxious feelings are impacting your life in a huge way then you may want to seek professional help from a counselor. If you find yourself feeling anxious some days but it is mostly manageable then you can make a few changes on your own. As a psychotherapist, I always ask my clients the amount of caffeine they consume daily. It is common that a lot of adults consume a lot of coffee, tea, and sugar throughout their day. Caffeine is the first thing I tell my anxious clients to try decreasing, or cutting out of their diet, to see if that helps decrease their anxious symptoms.
As a mental health counselor, I get asked a lot what types of jobs my clients should get. A therapist can act as a career coach in sorts as we can help determine what jobs fit your personality, values, and interests. A common question I am asked are what jobs are good for people who have experience social anxiety. I have found that there are a lot of jobs out there who are a great fit for people with social anxiety disorder.
