toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues
couples therapy, hoboken counseling, jersey city therapist, mental health blog, nyc counselor, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist
trauma counseling, nyc counselor, nj therapist, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
How to Heal Childhood Trauma as an Adult

When you think of a child, you probably imagine a young person who is resilient and fast-moving. These traits may cause you to believe that situations do not leave a lasting impact on children’s emotional health; however, that is not the case. If left unsolved, your emotions that came from a traumatic experience as a child can live in your subconscious mind. This will continue to affect you until you detect, process, and solve it. In order to heal childhood trauma as an adult, you have to learn how to process painful emotions.

A healthy way to respond to childhood trauma occurs right after the trauma has taken place. When the trauma occurs, you recognize that it is an offense to yourself. Afterward, you would feel your emotions and acknowledge the fact that the offense does not dictate anything about you personally. In other words, you do not make a negative meaning out of what occurred. Generally, it is rare for people to react in this manner.

This process is not automatic. Certain emotions, like rage and unhappiness, are difficult to express. On top of that, some cultures may view this outpouring of emotions to be socially unacceptable. Therefore, this causes many people to suppress their emotions. For a kid, this process is even more burdensome. For instance, someone may comment on a child’s weight or a part of their body which can cause a long-lasting inner dialogue to occur in the kid’s head, creating body dysmorphia. While this can happen to adults as well, it may be easier for an adult to push aside outside commentary in comparison to a child.

How to Heal Childhood Trauma as an Adult

Courtney Glashow Page

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Fourth Wing: Harnessing Internal Strength in the Face of Chronic Illness

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Fourth Wing: Harnessing Internal Strength in the Face of Chronic Illness

Spoilers ahead for Rebecca Yarros’s novel, Fourth Wing!

Living with a chronic medical condition can significantly impact one's mental health, as the challenges and limitations it presents can take a toll on overall well-being. However, in the new incredible novel Fourth Wing by Rabecca Yarros that has gone viral, we encounter a remarkable 20-year-old female character named Violet Sorrengail who defies the odds and showcases unwavering internal strength despite her battle with Ehlers-Danlos syndrome. Giving the heroine of the story a chronic illness is unique and not typically accepted as a large community. However, Rebecca Yarros does an incredible job in seamlessly incorporating the illness into the character and explores the intricate relationship between chronic illness and mental health. Violet’s character shows how her resilience serves as a powerful reminder that a chronic condition does not have to control one's life negatively.

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The Best Ways To Cope With Life Transitions

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The Best Ways To Cope With Life Transitions

Everyone experiences life transitions as they shift into a new chapter or role in their life. Some common examples are attending a new school, getting a new job, becoming a parent, getting married, losing someone, moving homes, opening a business, surviving a pandemic, and retiring. Since these life transitions are common and a lot of people experience them you may feel that you should be able to deal with it on your own since everyone else seems to. Just because others have experienced similar life transitions, it does not mean that it will be easy for you and you should not feel like you have to do it alone. In this blog I will discuss some common life transitions and how to cope with them. These coping tools can also apply to any life transition you are going through.

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How To Return To "Normal" With Post Pandemic Anxiety

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How To Return To "Normal" With Post Pandemic Anxiety

As we are starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel with the COVID-19 pandemic some people are starting to experience anxiety about having to return to their “normal” life. Since the pandemic lasted over a year, a lot of people have adjusted to a new normal that they’re now comfortable with. Because we have been told to stay home more and physically socially distance from others, it has led to people spending more and more time with the family they live with and people in their quarantine bubble. A lot of people had the luxury of working from home or anywhere that they can get access to WiFi. This led many people to move to a new location since they could truly work from anywhere. Now that millions of Americans are getting vaccinated, businesses and people in general are starting to discuss how they will operate after the COVID-19 is no longer a high risk. The thought about returning to normal has caused many people to feel anxious about making this transition.

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WandaVision: How It Got The 5 Stages Of Grief Right

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WandaVision: How It Got The 5 Stages Of Grief Right

WandaVision is an amazing show that aired on Disney+ as part of the Marvel Universe. It is definitely a must watch show if you love Marvel films. The premise of the show is that Wanda is a character who has suffered from a lot of loss and trauma throughout her life. She then fell in love with her partner Vision who she planned to spend the rest of her life with. After Wanda suffered the loss of her twin brother, her partner Vision then died. Because this is part of the Marvel Universe, Wanda also has intense superpowers in which she has a hard time controlling. Her immense amount of grief brings Wanda through the 5 stages of grief throughout this show in a very realistic way. Anyone who has been through a loss can relate to what Wanda seems to be going through.

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The Most Important Things You Need To Know About Anger Management

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The Most Important Things You Need To Know About Anger Management

You may have found yourself wondering how to control your anger lately as your emotions have gotten more and more heated. Therapy is a great resource to help with anger management. Before trying therapy, you can try some tips on your own to help deal with your anger. Whenever you are dealing with big emotions, you need to give yourself the time and space to practice techniques that can help. While reading the tips below you should see which one works best for you since everyone’s different. Once you find what helps, you should practice it as often as you can so that it becomes a habitual coping mechanism.

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Senioritis vs Depression: How To Decode Your Teen

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Senioritis vs Depression: How To Decode Your Teen

The time of year is approaching when senior year teens in high school are anxiously waiting for their grade school years to end. Your teen may already know what college they are going to, they may be waiting to see what college(s) they get into, or they may be figuring out something different to do after graduation. The final countdown to the end of high school is quickly approaching which can be a very exciting time, but it can also lead to many emotions and sometimes issues. It could be hard to tell if your teen has a lack of motivation, is feeling depressed, and/or has senioritis. I am here to help talk you through some of the differences to look out for.

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Sadness vs Depression: When To Get Help

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Sadness vs Depression: When To Get Help

We see a lot of clients who come in for therapy feeling unsure if they have a diagnosis of depression or if they’re just feeling a normal amount of sadness. There is a clinical way to diagnose depression and there are different degrees of a depression diagnosis: mild, moderate, and severe. You could also be experiencing a single episode of depression meaning that you have been experiencing these symptoms of sadness for 2 weeks-6 months. If you have been experiencing these symptoms for greater than 6 months then you would be diagnosed with a more long-term depression. The short answer here is that everyone could use the benefits that come from going to therapy. So even if you are feeling a normal amount of sadness and you don’t technically qualify for a depression diagnosis, you could still get a lot out of going to therapy. Counseling can help you feel more yourself and that you’re in a better place to take on the world.

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How LGBTQ+ Teens Benefit From Virtual Support Groups

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How LGBTQ+ Teens Benefit From Virtual Support Groups

Our LGBTQ+ Teen Group is our most popular support group for a reason. Most teens could use extra support from their peers to relate to and see that they are not alone in their struggles. Teens who identify as LGBTQ+ have a higher level of mental health issues and are in need of more support, acceptance, and guidance. When someone is questioning their identity, it is typically hard to know what to do about the possibility of coming out to others or how to process what they are feeling. Being in a group can help teens not only get support from likeminded peers, but it can also help them explore themselves more and find out who they truly are. A LGBTQ+ specific group provides the safe space needed to build a teen’s confidence.

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5 Things You Must Do Before This Year Ends

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5 Things You Must Do Before This Year Ends

The year 2020 will probably be known in future history books as one of the most challenging years to live through. Usually at this time of the year, people are reflecting on the past year and what is to come in the new year. While you are reflecting, you may think to yourself that you should accomplish some things before the year ends that you may not have checked off your list or had time to complete.

My overall answer as to what you must do before the end of the year is: NOTHING. Absolutely nothing. This year has taken its toll and your stress levels may be at an all time high. Hopefully you have some time off from work/school coming up that you can finally take some time to relax. You do not need to be productive at all times. It is actually more beneficial to take breaks and time off so that you can be at your highest level when you return. Don’t let anyone else make you feel like you should be productive at all moments of the day. You should never feel bad for relaxing. Relaxing can actually be purposeful and feel productive as well. Below are some tips on how to relax before the end of this year.

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How To Cancel Holiday Plans Last Minute

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How To Cancel Holiday Plans Last Minute

In the world of COVID-19 and a global pandemic, many people are having a lot of stress and anxiety with the upcoming holidays. Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, New Years Eve, and more holidays are right around the corner. People typically have traditions and plans to see family who they may not typically see throughout the year. December is usually a time when a lot of people get together with not only their loved ones, but also their colleagues and friends during multiple celebrations. In 2020, every social holiday tradition is being challenged and questioned as to how safe it is to celebrate as usual.

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How To Navigate Holiday Planning Stress During A Pandemic

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How To Navigate Holiday Planning Stress During A Pandemic

Normally, the holidays can be a stressful time to plan around different family, friend, and job celebrations. With the COVID-19 pandemic, the stress of the holidays has been at an all time high. With the colder weather approaching along with the holiday season, a lot of people are worried how they will continue to socialize safely with others. The best part about the holiday season is that you are spending time with people you care most about. It is typical to see some family or friends once a year due to the holidays. This year, it is not only hard to travel but it is also stressful to figure out how to plan holiday celebrations while feeling safe.

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7 Mental Health Tips For Getting Through Election Season

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7 Mental Health Tips For Getting Through Election Season

As a therapist, I have been seeing an increase in anxiety and stress due to the election season. With election day coming up, a lot of people are feeling scared, hopeless, nervous, angry, confused, and are experiencing relationship issues with others who oppose their views. All of these feelings are very normal and valid to have right now. If you are experiencing anxiety or stress due to the election, below are some tips to take that could help you get through each day. These tips are not meant to replace your need to take action during this time or to blind you from what is happening in our political climate right now. The goal here is to create awareness if are feeling overwhelmed and to take some time to better your mental health along the way.

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Top Reasons Depression Is Increasing For Athletes During COVID-19

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Top Reasons Depression Is Increasing For Athletes During COVID-19

The pandemic has been a difficult time for everyone, but one group of people who are experiencing increased symptoms of depression are athletes. Since March 2020, most sports were completely cancelled. Now that the fall is starting up with a new sports season, some sports are able to return. But a lot of sports remain cancelled or postponed. Athletes find a lot of purpose, motivation, and validation from competing in their sport. Due to COVID-19, this may be the first time in many years that an athlete does not have their sport to train for and feels empty.

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The Top Causes of Depression

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The Top Causes of Depression

Depression can impact anyone for a multitude of reasons. There is a lot of research into the cause of depression and there is not just one clear answer. There could be multiple reasons as to why you feel depressive symptoms. These causes can be broken down into two main categories that include biological factors and environmental factors. It is possible that you have one or both of these factors impacting your mood. Below I will discuss what falls under these two categories in detail.

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How To Support Your LGBTQ+ Teen

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How To Support Your LGBTQ+ Teen

Your pre-teen and teenage years are filled with time of exploring the world and how you fit in it. Identity becomes a huge topic of exploration for most teens. Your teen may be contemplating anything from as simple as their future career goals up to their gender identity or sexual orientation. This is typically a time that you may find your teen to come out to you by identifying as being a part of the LGBTQ+ community. As a parent, no matter how accepting you are, this may come as a surprise to you and it may take some time to process. Once you have processed this new information, you can then take some extra steps to support your teen as they navigate their new identity and grow into an adult.

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9 Normal Human Responses To A Global Pandemic

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9 Normal Human Responses To A Global Pandemic

After 2 months of experiencing stay-at-home orders, you may start to find yourself feeling not your normal self. A lot of people feel alone in how they are experiencing the impact of the global pandemic of the spread of COVID-19. While everyone does have a different life experience, we are all experiencing this trauma together. This is an event that is different than anything we have ever gone through before since it is an ongoing situation that is impacting everyone drastically. You may have experienced a loss in your job, a loved one, or you are isolated from others. Parents have become home school teachers while trying to continue to maintain their own jobs if possible. This is a time to survive and not to thrive. It is okay to not feel your best self or your most productive right now. Below are some things that you may feel during this pandemic that are completely normal to experience at this time and some ways how to help yourself.

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11 Tips To Working From Home If You Have Anxiety or Depression

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11 Tips To Working From Home If You Have Anxiety or Depression

Millions of people experience anxiety and/or depression in their lifetime. Due to the spread of COVID-19, we have been physically isolated from others. This has caused a spike in mental health issues such as anxiety and depression. In addition to these increasing symptoms of anxiety and depression, you are expected to work your full-time job from home (if you are lucky enough that your job allows you to make this transition). It has become difficult to manage your mental health along with this major adjustment of working from home. Below I will go through realistic tips on how you can manage working from home if you are also experiencing any level of anxiety and/or depression.

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How To Practice Self-Care During COVID-19 Isolation

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How To Practice Self-Care During COVID-19 Isolation

Hoboken, along with the states of New Jersey and New York, has been doing a great job in taking the lead in the country with rules around self-isolation and staying at home. However, this self-isolation is going to have a huge impact on everyone’s mental health as it is projected to continue longer than one month. It is important to look out for signs of depression, anxiety, increased disordered eating behaviors, OCD, and substance abuse at this time. Please remember that you are doing Hoboken, or your community, an amazing service by staying inside. But as you practice this self-isolation, you will most likely see a decline in your mental health. It is really important to take care of your mental health (more than ever!) during this time. Below are some ways in which you can do just that.

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All You Need To Know About Telehealth Mental Health Therapy Services

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All You Need To Know About Telehealth Mental Health Therapy Services

Due to the spread of the covid-19 virus, we have transitioned to telehealth sessions only until it is safe to go back to in-person sessions. most mental health professionals and other businesses are making the shift to work from home to stop the spread of the coronavirus. luckily mental health has always been effective through telehealth sessions. research actually shows that telehealth sessions are just as beneficial as in-person sessions. at anchor therapy, we want to help flatten the curve as much as possible so that our hospitals hopefully do not get overrun. below is all the information you need to know about telehealth for mental health therapy sessions.

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6 Ways To Handle Intrusive Thoughts

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6 Ways To Handle Intrusive Thoughts

An intrusive thought is something that we all experience from time to time. An intrusive thought is when you have an unwanted and involuntary thought, image, or idea that is upsetting or distressing pop into your mind. Some people realize that these thoughts are not based on reality and they can easily brush them off and move on to a next thought. While others have a hard time dealing with these intrusive thoughts and find themselves in a destructive thought loop. Most people find these types of thoughts disturbing and spend a lot of time questioning their reality because of it. Intrusive thoughts are more common and frequent for someone who experiences depression and/or anxiety. Below are some ways that you can handle these intrusive thoughts if they do come into your mind and disrupt your thinking.