Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist
Courtney Glashow
Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team. 

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk. 

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families
love bombing, nyc therapist, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
Overcoming the Aftermath of Love Bombing

Love bombing is a specific type of emotional abuse. It is a tactic where someone will “bomb” you with extreme displays of affection and attention. While it may seem like this person has fallen head over heels and madly in love with you, there is a darker truth to the matter. A love bomber is using their grand gestures with the intent of manipulating you. 

Being showered with love and affection can feel good and even positive at the very beginning of the relationship, but it can lead to serious issues down the road, like gaslighting and abuse. Love bombing is a very common tactic used by narcissists and sociopaths in relationships so they can control you.

Overcoming the Aftermath of Love Bombing
toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Parenting Page

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5 Ways to Help Your Children with Behavioral Issues in School

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5 Ways to Help Your Children with Behavioral Issues in School

Dealing with behavioral issues in school can be challenging for both children and parents alike. Whether it is trouble focusing, acting out, or having difficulty following instructions, these behaviors can disrupt a child's learning and social development. As a parent, it is essential to understand that these challenges are often linked to underlying emotional or developmental factors. Instead of focusing on punishment, finding supportive, proactive strategies can help your child improve their behavior and feel more confident in their school environment.


In this blog, we will explore five effective ways to help your child navigate behavioral issues at school. From open communication with teachers to setting consistent routines at home, these strategies are designed to empower both parents and children. By taking a compassionate and solution-oriented approach, you can create a positive environment that supports your child’s growth and success, both academically and socially!

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What To Do When In An Unhappy Marriage

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What To Do When In An Unhappy Marriage

Marriage can be one of the most fulfilling aspects of life, but when it starts to feel more like a source of stress and unhappiness, it can be difficult to know where to turn. If you are in an unhappy marriage, you are not alone—many couples experience periods of disconnection or frustration. In fact, research shows that approximately 14% of couples are unhappy in their marriage. Acknowledging the problem is the first step toward finding a solution. Whether it is through communication, couples counseling, or self-reflection, there are ways to navigate these tough moments and make meaningful changes.


It is important to remember that no marriage is perfect, and challenges are a natural part of any relationship. However, when unhappiness lingers, it is crucial to take proactive steps to address the root causes. By approaching the situation with empathy, patience, and an open mind, couples can often find ways to rebuild trust, improve communication, and rekindle the connection that brought them together in the first place.

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6 Ways to Overcome Emotional Eating

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6 Ways to Overcome Emotional Eating

Emotional eating is a common struggle many people face, often turning to food as a way to cope with stress, anxiety, sadness, or even boredom. Instead of eating out of hunger, emotional eating involves using food as a source of comfort which can lead to overeating and unhealthy food choices. This cycle can be difficult to break, especially when food provides temporary relief from overwhelming emotions. However, recognizing the pattern is the first step toward gaining control and developing healthier habits!


Overcoming emotional eating requires a combination of mindfulness, emotional awareness, and practical strategies. By understanding the emotional triggers behind your cravings and finding alternative ways to address them, you can build a healthier relationship with food. In this blog, we will explore six effective strategies to help you break free from emotional eating, regain control of your eating habits, and foster a more balanced and mindful approach to food.

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The Psychological Truth About Birth Order

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The Psychological Truth About Birth Order

Birth order has long been a topic of fascination with many believing that where you fall in your family can shape who you become. From the responsible firstborn to the free-spirited youngest, the roles siblings play within their families may impact their personality, behavior, and even career choices. While the science behind birth order theory has evolved, the idea that your position in the family hierarchy influences your development remains compelling to many psychotherapists and parents alike!


Understanding the psychological truth about birth order can provide valuable insight into why we act the way we do, not just as children, but as adults navigating relationships, work, and personal growth. While no two families are alike and the theory is far from being set in stone, there are clear patterns that suggest birth order might shape our core traits. This blog will delve into the fascinating ways our birth position might shape our outlook on life and why those dynamics are still worth considering in modern times.

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5 Ways to Navigate Crises in Hoboken, NJ

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5 Ways to Navigate Crises in Hoboken, NJ

Hoboken, New Jersey is a vibrant city known for its waterfront views, bustling streets, and tight-knit community. However, like any urban area, it is not immune to crises- whether it is flooding from heavy storms, power outages, or public transit disruptions. Being prepared and knowing how to navigate emergencies can make all the difference in staying safe and minimizing the impact on your daily life. By staying informed, planning ahead, and tapping into local resources, Hoboken residents can confidently handle unexpected challenges.


From emergency alerts to evacuation routes, having a solid plan in place is crucial. Hoboken’s geography makes it particularly susceptible to flooding and, with its dense population, transit delays and power outages can quickly escalate into major disruptions. In recent years, the community has also endured deeply unsettling events, including multiple building lockdowns due to active threats requiring SWAT intervention, as well as a frightening school incident where a student threatened violence, forcing children and parents to endure repeated lockdowns. In this guide, we will cover five essential ways to stay ahead of potential crises, ensuring that you and your loved ones remain safe and mentally resilient no matter what comes your way.

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What Is It Like Being The Golden Child?

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What Is It Like Being The Golden Child?

If you are the golden child in your family, chances are that you feel like you are living in a spotlight- always praised, always expected to succeed, and often held up as the example for others to follow, especially siblings. Parents, teachers, and even extended family members may shower you with admiration, reinforcing a sense of confidence and achievement. To learn more about your sense of self-confidence, check out our blog “The Ultimate Guide to Building Self-Confidence.” Knowing that your accomplishments are met with pride and celebration can be very validating and keep you in a loop of wanting to seek constant approval from other people. At times, you may even feel like you can do no wrong in the eyes of others. You may find that your mistakes are overlooked or easily forgiven. 


However, the role of the golden child is not always as perfect as it seems. The pressure to maintain high expectations can be overwhelming, leading to feelings of anxiety, imposter syndrome, or fear of failure. You might feel like your worth is tied solely to your achievements, making it difficult to express vulnerability or make mistakes without disappointing others. Additionally, relationships with siblings can be strained as they may resent the preferential treatment you receive. Being the golden child can be both a privilege and a burden, shaping your self-worth and family dynamics in ways that are not always obvious at first glance. If you resonate with being a golden child, keep reading this blog.

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All About Career Coaching for CEOs

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All About Career Coaching for CEOs

In the high-stakes world of being a Chief Executive Officer (CEO), you operate from a place of leadership with great internal and external pressure and immense responsibility. You have to balance many priorities- setting visionary goals, making important decisions, steering your company towards sustainable success, and so on. As a CEO, you help many people on a daily basis, but who helps you? This is where working with a career coach at Anchor Therapy can come into play. Career coaching is a transformational tool for both personal and professional success so you can refine your leadership abilities while also empowering you to fully embrace the complexity of your roles. Contrary to popular belief, career coaching is not going to teach you how to run a business. Instead, career counseling is a tool to help you unlock your true potential and stay ahead in a corporate environment that is always changing.

Society often views CEOs as the embodiment of true success, but that does not mean that CEOs do not face their own share of challenges. From generating innovation to managing team dynamics, being a CEO is not easy work. Therefore, career coaching for CEOs gives you the space to reflect, prepare, and improve their vision for the future. It can help you create and exercise the skills needed to address hardships from a place of confidence where you can transform difficulties into opportunities.

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What To Do If You Are Unhappy In Your Marriage

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What To Do If You Are Unhappy In Your Marriage

Any relationship is a partnership built on love, trust, and shared dreams, but this can especially be true for a marriage. Even if you feel like you and your spouse’s relationship is a very strong one, rough patches can occur which may leave one or both of you feeling unsatisfied or disconnected. If you are experiencing unhappiness in your marriage, you may feel stuck or unsure of where to turn to next. If you are struggling with this, please understand that you are not alone. In fact, a journalist conducted a study and revealed that six out of 10 couples are unhappily coupled. Acknowledging that something is off in your relationship is the first step towards working to a point of solution.


Being unhappy in your marriage does not mean that divorce is impending- it is just a signal that something needs a little extra attention in your romantic connection, whether it is different communication styles or intimacy issues. Through effect and the professional support of a couples counselor at Anchor Therapy, you can address the issues in your marriage and build a healthier, more fulfilling relationship.

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What is Perinatal Psychotherapy?

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What is Perinatal Psychotherapy?

Perinatal psychotherapy is a form of mental health counseling designed to help women during the perinatal period, including pregnancy, childbirth, and the postpartum phase. This type of therapy focuses on addressing the various emotional and mental health challenges that can arise during this time, from anxiety and depression to the life transition of parenthood. The primary goal is to help women navigate the complex emotional and psychological changes that come along with being a parent. Not only are you managing the physical and emotional demands of pregnancy, but you are also planning for the major life change that comes along with the birth of a child.


Perinatal therapy is especially important because many women experience increased vulnerability during the perinatal period. Of course, pregnancy and childbirth comes along with physical demands, but there is also potential for emotional difficulties, such as postpartum depression or anxiety. A perinatal therapist at Anchor Therapy can give you a safe and supportive space to explore your emotions, process past trauma, and successfully manage the stress of transitioning from pregnancy to parenthood. Perinatal counseling can also benefit women experiencing fears about pregnancy or childbirth, those with mental health disorders, and/or parents struggling with the emotional demands of having a newborn.

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How Does Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) Affect You Mentally?

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How Does Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) Affect You Mentally?

Polycystic Ovary Syndrome, simply referred to as PCOS, is a hormonal disorder that impacts women who are of reproductive age. While the cause of PCOS is not well known, we do know that it causes enlarged ovaries with small cysts on the outer edges. Health experts believe a combination of genetic and environmental factors are at play with this disorder. 

The effects of PCOS are still being studied, but we know that those with the disorder can experience a wide range of mental health concerns, from anxiety and depression to eating disorders and low self-esteem. Continue reading this blog to figure out how PCOS may be impacting you mentally and emotionally, and what you can do to cope.

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What are the goals of psychodynamic therapy?

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What are the goals of psychodynamic therapy?

If you have attended therapy or have an idea of what mental health counseling looks like in your head, one of the first things that comes to mind is likely the question, “How does that make you feel?”. Think about any therapy reference in popular culture and some form of that question is likely present. With that being said, some of the more popular, modern types of therapy, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), do not place this question at the forefront of counseling sessions.


Psychodynamic therapy can be applied for a variety of mental health concerns; however, many people may not know about this therapeutic practice. Psychodynamic therapy offers a holistic approach to mental health care. To learn more, continue reading this blog!

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Exploring Golden Child Syndrome

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Exploring Golden Child Syndrome

A “golden child” the ‘special’ member of a given family unit. Oftentimes, the golden child is pushed to be nothing short of perfect. This typically happens because a parent wants their child to achieve in areas of life where they did not. As a golden child, you may resonate with being able to perform well under pressure, constantly seeking reassurance from your parents, and not being allowed to tell people your true emotions.

Your parents may view your successes as their own which perpetuates a cycle where they are constantly setting high expectations for you. This may cause you to feel excess stress, and you may even begin to feel confused about who you are. Constantly feeling pushes to keep going and achieving with no breaks or self-care can very easily lead to anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. 
If the cycle of being the golden child is not broken, the consequences can last a lifetime. You may feel like, no matter how hard you try, you are never good enough. You may have a hard time making decisions on your own without reassurance from other people. You may self-sabotage relationships in your life because you expect the other person to be perfect as well, pushing these unrealistic standards onto others.

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5 Places to Practice Mindfulness in Hoboken, NJ

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5 Places to Practice Mindfulness in Hoboken, NJ

Let us face the truth- living in the greater New York City area can feel overwhelming at times. The vibrant cityscape of Hoboken can make finding moments of peace and mindfulness seem challenging. 

Whether you are a seasoned mindfulness expert or just beginning your journey to better mental health, Hoboken does have some hidden gems so you can quiet your mind and recharge your soul. From tucking away in a serene cafe to visiting a tranquil park with gorgeous waterfront views, it is possible to find a mindful escape within your own city. To discover five places to practice mindfulness in Hoboken, continue reading this blog!

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What conditions may be treated with CBT therapy near me?

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What conditions may be treated with CBT therapy near me?

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, often simply referred to as CBT, is a type of structured talk therapy that is structured and goal-oriented. Mental health professionals, from psychologists to psychotherapists and counselors, use CBT to treat or manage a range of mental health conditions and/or emotional concerns. 


If you are someone who is starting off in your journey of trying to find a therapist near you, you likely have come across CBT therapy. For support in this journey, read “How to Find the Best Therapist Near Me.” CBT is often referred to as the gold standard of mental health counseling as it is one of the most common and best-studied forms of mental health therapy.

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How to Fix Attachment Issues As An Adult

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How to Fix Attachment Issues As An Adult

Children and teens with attachment concerns may detach from their parents or caregivers, or become overly-friendly with random adults. As they age into adulthood, having attachment issues can present difficulties in forming meaningful relationships and negatively impact one’s social development as a whole.

An attachment disorder is a behavioral disorder that can affect your ability to form and maintain connections with other people, whether it is platonic or romantic. Attachment disorders are common in children and teens but, if it is not healed, it can persist into adulthood. 

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How to Parent Anxious Children in Hoboken, NJ

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How to Parent Anxious Children in Hoboken, NJ

Parenting is a difficult job, and it can be made even more difficult when you are parenting a child or teen with mental health issues, like anxiety. Everyone has worried thoughts and feelings from time-to-time. Perhaps your child is leaving for summer camp and they are concerned about making friends and being away from home. Maybe they are presenting at their school’s science fair and feel nervous. 

However, when nerve-wracking thoughts cross the line into the territory of anxiety, it may be a sign that your child requires the help of an anxiety therapist. Anxiety counseling can serve as a form of relief for your child from anxiety, and provide them with the coping skills needed to successfully navigate life transitions.

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How to Support Your Child After They Come Out

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How to Support Your Child After They Come Out

If your child or teen comes out to you, how you react deeply matters. Raising children does not come with a manual or how-to guide. It is okay to not know how to react in every and all situations- you have to do what feels right for you and your family. 

If your child turns to you to reveal that they are LGBTQIA+ and are ready to come out, it is a great sign of trust that they can confide in you for something like this. This is a great sign showcasing their comfort level with you! But even so, you may have some questions or you may be wondering exactly how you should react. There are steps you can take to ensure that you are building a safe, inclusive home for your LGBTQIA+ child or teen.

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How To Support Your Teen Through High School and College Application Anxiety

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How To Support Your Teen Through High School and College Application Anxiety

The season of high school and college acceptances is upon us. By this time of the year, most students have an idea of where they will be heading in the fall whether it is a great magnet high school or a dream college a plane ride away. In a few weeks, students will sigh a final breath of relief when they commit to a school but, in the meantime, these last few moments of indecision can be painful and anxiety-ridden. Additionally, some teens and young adults may be grappling with the sting of rejection, forcing them to rethink their entire futures. 


The impact of your child’s stress during this entire process should not be overlooked. This process can also be grueling for you as a parent. You may be going through the ups and downs of the high school and college admissions process with your child as the acceptances, rejections, and waitlists roll in. When your teen is accepted, feelings of joy and excitement may overcome them. On the other hand, if your child is rejected, or even waitlisted, they may be completely and utterly devastated, especially if they are denied from their dream high school or college. This experience undeniably plays a role in your teen’s mental health.

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What You Didn’t Know About Blending Families

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What You Didn’t Know About Blending Families

Blended families can face many bumps in the road. Perhaps your family unit is dealing with a particularly challenging sibling rivalry or you are working to build a strong relationship with your step-children. Luckily, when you plan ahead and get the proper support you and your family needs, you can make sure that the transition goes more smoothly. Helpful family management strategies, including setting house rules and opening all lines of communication, are some ways to construct a warm and welcoming family. 

In some cases, it may feel like you are doing everything right but you and your family are still struggling. Please know that this is completely okay. Building your family is a major life transition and struggles are bound to arrive, but you deal with them can determine your success. You may feel like family counseling is the best next step for your family. If you need additional help navigating this major change in your life, check out our blog: “The Best Ways To Cope With Life Transitions.”

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How to Cope With Empty Nest Syndrome

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How to Cope With Empty Nest Syndrome

When you become a parent, it can quickly become the main component of your identity. You may lose yourself while taking care of your children while balancing work and other life responsibilities at the same time. Many parents often regard parenthood as one of the most challenging yet meaningful things they will ever do.

As the saying goes, the days are long but the years go by fast. One day you may be potty training and, then you blink, and you are getting ready to send your teen away to college. For at least 18 years, your life has revolved around your child. You may have been in charge of carpools, making sure that your child gets to all of their extracurricular activities in a timely manner, or having to guide them with homework or additional school projects. Then, when your teen leaves for college or to the workforce, your day-to-day life instantly changes.

If you are going through this, please know that it is normal to feel loss or uncertainty when your child leaves. This may be an only child or your youngest. Whatever the case, your feelings are valid. The main objective of parenting is to raise a healthy young adult who can live life independent of you. While your child is taking on a major life transition, moving out of their childhood home or going to college, you should take pride in the fact that you did the best you could and your child will be okay. Even if you acknowledge the hard work and effort you put into parenting, you may still be struggling. This may be what we commonly refer to as empty nest syndrome.

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