toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues
couples therapy, hoboken counseling, jersey city therapist, mental health blog, nyc counselor, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist
trauma counseling, nyc counselor, nj therapist, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
How to Heal Childhood Trauma as an Adult

When you think of a child, you probably imagine a young person who is resilient and fast-moving. These traits may cause you to believe that situations do not leave a lasting impact on children’s emotional health; however, that is not the case. If left unsolved, your emotions that came from a traumatic experience as a child can live in your subconscious mind. This will continue to affect you until you detect, process, and solve it. In order to heal childhood trauma as an adult, you have to learn how to process painful emotions.

A healthy way to respond to childhood trauma occurs right after the trauma has taken place. When the trauma occurs, you recognize that it is an offense to yourself. Afterward, you would feel your emotions and acknowledge the fact that the offense does not dictate anything about you personally. In other words, you do not make a negative meaning out of what occurred. Generally, it is rare for people to react in this manner.

This process is not automatic. Certain emotions, like rage and unhappiness, are difficult to express. On top of that, some cultures may view this outpouring of emotions to be socially unacceptable. Therefore, this causes many people to suppress their emotions. For a kid, this process is even more burdensome. For instance, someone may comment on a child’s weight or a part of their body which can cause a long-lasting inner dialogue to occur in the kid’s head, creating body dysmorphia. While this can happen to adults as well, it may be easier for an adult to push aside outside commentary in comparison to a child.

How to Heal Childhood Trauma as an Adult
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Unlocking the Secrets of Quality Sleep: A Therapist's Perspective on Sleep Hygiene and Insomnia

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Unlocking the Secrets of Quality Sleep: A Therapist's Perspective on Sleep Hygiene and Insomnia

The Importance of Sleep Hygiene

Sleep hygiene refers to a set of practices and habits that are conducive to getting a good night's sleep on a regular basis. It encompasses various factors, including environmental, behavioral, and psychological elements that can influence the quality and duration of sleep. Adequate sleep is essential for overall health and well-being, yet many people struggle to get enough restorative sleep due to poor sleep hygiene practices. It is important to address this issue and make improvements due to the negative effects poor sleep quality has on an individual. It is important to implement these tips if you are struggling with your quality of sleep and are noticing the effects of that. 

Good sleep hygiene aims to create an environment conducive to falling asleep easily, staying asleep throughout the night, and waking up feeling refreshed and energized. 

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The Truth About Being An Empath

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The Truth About Being An Empath

As a human being, you may have built natural filters that purify what you let into your life. You can think of this as a guard or wall that you have constructed to not let surrounding emotions and energies into your space. You do this to safeguard yourself from excessive stimulation, but what happens when those walls drop down and you have no barrier? Welcome to the life of an empath.

An empath is like a sponge that absorbs the world’s problems and takes them as his or her own. As an empath, you may have a higher sensitivity to certain people, places, or sounds, especially people with big personalities or hectic settings. You feel things very deeply and give your whole heart to everything you do.

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5 Ways to Cope With A Narcissistic Parent

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5 Ways to Cope With A Narcissistic Parent

Narcissistic parents can be very controlling, critical, and possessive of their own children. One of the biggest fears of a narcissistic parent is that their child will become independent of them. In order to prevent this from happening, a narcissistic parent will humiliate their children or shame them. 

A narcissistic parent may be self-centered and/or seek attention from external sources. If you have a narcissistic mother or a narcissistic father, you may wonder how you should interact with them and how your family will be able to function moving forward. Keeping a relationship with your parent(s) does not mean giving up your own mental and emotional well-being.

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Pawsitive Healing: A Therapist's Take on Pets and Mental Well-being

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Pawsitive Healing: A Therapist's Take on Pets and Mental Well-being

In a fast-paced world filled with stressors and uncertainties, having a pet can be life changing in many ways. It can have a positive impact on our overall well-being, not only our mental health but our physical health as well. Beyond their cuteness and cuddles, pets have a remarkable ability to provide us with emotional support and companionship that we don’t always get from humans. As I am writing this and cuddling with my dog, I can say first hand that adopting a dog is one of the best decisions I’ve ever made! Some of the ways pets can help us are by reducing stress, providing love and companionship, sharing emotional support, giving us a sense of purpose, and helping with disabilities. In this blog we will dive into the many ways pets can change our lives for the better!

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Everything You Need To Know About Sexual Trauma Therapy

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Everything You Need To Know About Sexual Trauma Therapy

Anyone who has experienced physical or sexual violence in their life knows the devastating affects it can have on your psychological well-being and physical self. Even after the sexual trauma has happened, the negative ramifications continue to live on. After your trauma, you may lose faith in humanity, therefore making it more difficult for you to trust people.

Healing from sexual trauma is a highly individualized experience, and there is no timeline put on healing. In order to journey ahead on this emotionally-taxing process, you need to practice time, patience, self-compassion, and locate the right resources, like a trauma therapist.

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When to Seek A Therapist as a Stay-At-Home-Mom (SAHM) in Hoboken + Jersey City

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When to Seek A Therapist as a Stay-At-Home-Mom (SAHM) in Hoboken + Jersey City

Raising children is no easy task. As the age-old saying goes, “It takes a village to raise a child”, but what happens if you do not have that village to rely on? What if child care is always on you? Raising a child is a privilege, but it does not mean that it is an easy task by any means. It is a continuous labor of love and, even when you feel like you have nothing else to give, you have to keep going.

Due to a variety of reasons, you may have opted to become a Stay-At-Home Mom (SAHM). Perhaps you have always wanted to be an extra hands-on mother or, due to the cost of child care, you have decided to stay at home, handle the kids, and other daily responsibilities. Fathers can also take on the role of a stay-at-home parent, but the position is primarily occupied by mothers. According to the Pew Research Center, 26% of mothers stay at home while only 7% of fathers stay at home.

As a SAHM, it is normal to feel down from time to time. Just like any other job, the days can feel mundane and you may feel isolated from adult interactions. However, if you are experiencing constant thoughts of despair or feel purposeless, you may be dealing with SAHM burnout or SAHM depression.

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5 Ways to Beat Gym Anxiety

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5 Ways to Beat Gym Anxiety

When you start working out in a new environment, you may experience gym anxiety. As a child or teen, gym anxiety may manifest as being afraid of going to physical education class. As an adult, you may be afraid to try out a new workout or even go to a group workout class with other people.

If you suffer from Social Anxiety Disorder, simply referred to as SAD, your fear of going to the gym or going to physical education class may be so serious that you are constantly thinking about it throughout the day. You may have knots in your stomach about the mere thought of going to the gym after work, triggering your SAD symptoms. For more information read “6 Helpful Tips for Living with Social Anxiety.” It could even lead to a panic attack. For support, check out our blog “How to Manage A Panic Attack.”

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Stepparenting Family Therapy in New Jersey

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Stepparenting Family Therapy in New Jersey

A stepfamily forms when one or two adults in a new romantic relationship have children from a previous relationship. On the outside, you may look like a normal, traditional family but, on the inside, there are complex dynamics which can make parenting look a little different than usual. 

If you are working to strengthen the bond of connection between a parent or step-parent, you have to understand the differences between stepfamilies versus first-time families. Your previous marriage or relationship with your child’s other parent may have ended in divorce or be the result of a major, traumatic life transition, like the death of a loved one. There also may be changes in your new relationship dynamic. For example, you may have previously been in a heterosexual relationship and, now, you may be in a homosexual relationship.

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6 Ways to Get Rid of Homesickness

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6 Ways to Get Rid of Homesickness

When you are away from home and in a new environment, you may experience homesickness, also known as a feeling of emotional distress. You may have moved temporarily or permanently, such as being a college student, working in the military, or being a migrant or refugee. According to the BBC, up to 70 percent of people experience homesickness at one point in time.

Feeling homesick is common following a major life transition, like graduating high school and beginning your college career. Everyone reacts differently to homesickness, but some common signs and symptoms can include anxiety, depression, and physical symptoms. To learn more about your physical symptoms, check out our previous blog “3 Ways to Manage Your Physical Anxiety Symptoms.” To overcome your homesickness, it is important to maintain a connection to your home while also taking steps to modify your current setting so it fits your needs. For more information, keep reading along!

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Are You In A Relationship With A Controlling Partner?

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Are You In A Relationship With A Controlling Partner?

A relationship is based on mutual respect, satisfaction, and love. When negative qualities begin to creep in and dominate your relationship instead, your connection can take an unhealthy turn rather quickly. Control issues can manifest different ways depending on the type of romantic connection present. Control issues may not even be noticeable in the beginning of a relationship.

Control issues can be very harmful to a relationship. Whether you are the controller or feel like you are the partner being controlled, you may not even notice it until the damage to your relationship has already ensued. 

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3 Steps to Becoming More Vulnerable

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3 Steps to Becoming More Vulnerable

Vulnerability plays an important role in our ability to connect with other people. Vulnerability includes emotional exposure with a certain level of unpredictability. When you learn how to be unguarded, you are also learning how to accept a degree of emotional risk that comes along with being open and willing to give and receive love.

If you are afraid of being vulnerable, you are not alone. It is a very common fear to have. However, once you comprehend vulnerability at its core and understand that there is an emotional challenge, you will gain appreciation for being vulnerable and realize that it is well worth the effort. In turn, you can become more vulnerable with the people you care about the most, and build better and stronger connections with your loved ones.

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What to Expect in Sex Therapy

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What to Expect in Sex Therapy

If you are looking to achieve satisfaction in your sex life, sex therapy may be the answer. Working with a licensed sex therapist can help you as an individual or couple in resolving common sexual issues, such as intimacy issues and sexual dysfunction. Sex counseling is just like any other form of talk therapy - you sit down with a couples counselor to work through your problems.

Some couples can take care of their sexual relationship on their own while others may need some assistance and that is perfectly okay. There needs to be a balance of “I” and “we” in a relationship and your sex therapist will likely stress this concept to you.

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Navigating Social Media: A Mental Health Therapist's Guide to Balance and Well-Being

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Navigating Social Media: A Mental Health Therapist's Guide to Balance and Well-Being

You may be feeling overwhelmed by social media lately and want to take a break but you don’t want to miss out on your friends posts and the news. Why does excessive scrolling make us feel bad, but it can also be enjoyable at the same time? Let's take a pause and talk about how social media is affecting our minds, the positives and the negatives and what to do about it.

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Overcoming the Trap of Toxic Positivity

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Overcoming the Trap of Toxic Positivity

When someone is going through a difficult life transition, you may want to jump to offering words of wisdom or encourage them to focus on the positive. After all, positivity is a good thing, right? While positivity refers to the practice of being optimistic, the pressure to be positive no matter what is going on in your life can go wrong, causing serious issues down the road.

If you adopt a mindset of toxic positivity, you believe that everything is okay when, in reality, it is not. In a world filled with social comparison, you may feel pressure to create the illusion or even make yourself believe that everything is going fine, but life is much more complicated than that. Life is not always going to be all rainbows and butterflies and, once you accept that, you can see that there is beauty in that and in ditching the mindset of toxic positivity!

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Overcoming the Aftermath of Love Bombing

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Overcoming the Aftermath of Love Bombing

Love bombing is a specific type of emotional abuse. It is a tactic where someone will “bomb” you with extreme displays of affection and attention. While it may seem like this person has fallen head over heels and madly in love with you, there is a darker truth to the matter. A love bomber is using their grand gestures with the intent of manipulating you. 

Being showered with love and affection can feel good and even positive at the very beginning of the relationship, but it can lead to serious issues down the road, like gaslighting and abuse. Love bombing is a very common tactic used by narcissists and sociopaths in relationships so they can control you.

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What Is Seasonal Affective Disorder and How Is It Treated?

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What Is Seasonal Affective Disorder and How Is It Treated?

You may be feeling down this winter, unhappy and not like yourself. Many of us have heard the term “seasonal depression” or “winter blues.” Many adults, especially women, feel this way but are unsure why and what to do about it. You could be suffering from Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), which is a highly treatable mental health condition.

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How to Battle The Loneliness Epidemic

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How to Battle The Loneliness Epidemic

As human beings, our need to socially connect with other people is innate. Loneliness can occur when there is a gap present between your desire for a social connection and the actual experiences of it. This gap can trigger a state of distress or discomfort. Even if you are surrounded by a lot of people throughout the day, you may still experience loneliness. Loneliness can threaten both your mental and physical health.

Anyone can experience loneliness, but the way each person experiences it is unique. It is completely possible to feel lonely without necessarily being alone. On the other hand, you may be alone and not feel lonely at all.

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7 Ways An Anger Management Therapist Can Help You Control Your Road Rage

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7 Ways An Anger Management Therapist Can Help You Control Your Road Rage

When you get your driver’s license, your world expands. You no longer have to rely on public transportation or other people to get you from point A to point B but, with that being said, there is also a new world of responsibilities that come along with this life transition. With a driver’s license, you can visit family and friends, uncover your independence, and explore new places. Cars offer freedom, but it comes at a price, like requiring you to have the ability to regulate your emotions.

Road rage is a problem that is alive and well in the United States. Road rage has inspired more serious issues, like significant injuries, property damage, and even death. Many car accidents involve some type of unsafe driving behavior, like “road rage” or aggressive driving. If you find yourself being filled with anger when you drive and participating in rage-motivated, unsafe driving behaviors, it is important to get to the root cause of this issue to resolve it so you can keep yourself and other people on the road safe.

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How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Other People

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How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Other People

While we all may try our hardest, it is human nature to compare ourselves to other people from time-to-time. You see a man in the gym and wish you had his muscles. You pass a particularly stylish woman in the street and yearn for her wardrobe. You scroll endlessly on social media and envy the lives of online influencers, longing for their money and the freedom to pick up and travel to wherever you wish.

The tendency to compare yourself to other people is a subconscious behavior, but it is one that is important to keep in check, especially if you find yourself comparing yourself to many people on a daily basis. While this type of social comparison may inspire you to be better, it could also lead to negative thoughts.

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5 Things To Do When You Don’t Know What To Say In Therapy

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5 Things To Do When You Don’t Know What To Say In Therapy

The process of finding a therapist who is a good fit for you is difficult. If you want in-person sessions, is the counselor close to you? If you travel a lot, can your therapist offer online mental health counseling sessions? Perhaps you feel more comfortable speaking to a male therapist to discuss men’s health issues. Maybe you want a female therapist who understands the difficulty of infertility. 

Once you find a therapist, it may temporarily feel like a weight is lifted off of your shoulders but, then, your first session comes around and you feel like you have nothing to say. You feel like you are ready to work on yourself, but you find yourself clamming up and getting nervous once you are face-to-face with a stranger. All of a sudden, the process may seem very overwhelming to you. If you have felt this way at some point during therapy, you are not alone! This is a common phenomenon known as “therapy block” or “therapy resistance.” For more information on how to fix this issue, keep reading!