Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist
Courtney Glashow
Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team. 

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk. 

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families
toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues
couples therapy, hoboken counseling, jersey city therapist, mental health blog, nyc counselor, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

college counselor

, ,

Beyond the Couch: Creating a Welcoming Environment for Therapy Clients

, ,
Beyond the Couch: Creating a Welcoming Environment for Therapy Clients

While therapy can be an incredibly transformational space, it can also be a place of discomfort. In fact, after a good therapy session, you may not feel the best. Reliving your trauma, challenging your Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) intrusive thoughts, and learning how to cope with Postpartum Depression (PPD) are not easy things after all. But, it will allow you to live a better quality of life in the long-term. 

With all of that being said, there are steps your therapist can take to ensure your comfort in mental health counseling sessions. In order for therapy to be a successful process for you, vulnerability is key. Honestly sharing your experiences, thoughts, and behaviors with your therapist in a safe space is of the utmost importance.

, , , ,

Balancing Home and College: Navigating Mental Health During Holiday Breaks

, , , ,
Balancing Home and College: Navigating Mental Health During Holiday Breaks

The Holidays can be a very exciting time. Around the time of the holidays, there is a lot of joy and giving. People are usually in high spirits and excited for the holiday. For college students, this may look different. This is the time when college students are cramming for exams, overwhelmed and stressed, all leading up to going home for winter break. This can take a significant toll on the mental health of students. After finals and moving back into their parent's house, being back in their hometown can be a significant change. With so much going on, not having the chance to sit down and reflect on these changes can result in feelings of anxiety and depression. 


Feeling mentally and physically drained after college semester:

The weeks leading up to going home for winter break can be extremely stressful and mentally taxing. Coming home for winter break can be very exciting but also sad. Although it is the holidays, you are ready to go home and miss your family. Right before going home, you may find yourself staying up late, cramming for your final exams. You may be trying to fit in social time with your friends before you go your separate ways for the break. In just a few short weeks after Thanksgiving break, you may be homesick and feeling burnt out with the end of the semester so close. Jumping back into school after being off for a week and being expected to study and take exams can take a toll on college students. After a long semester and the finish line so close, it can be hard to push yourself to that last stretch.

, , , , ,

7 Tips for Maintaining a Healthy Relationship in College

, , , , ,
7 Tips for Maintaining a Healthy Relationship in College

Why College Relationships Are Different

Dating in college may often feel or look different than a relationship you may have had in high school. In college, there are additional possibilities to find new people to connect with, along with the freedom to explore your identity in ways you were deprived of in high school. Coming into college with a relationship can be a challenge. Separating your personal lives and gaining new experiences without your partner is one of the biggest struggles. It is important not to limit yourself and spend all your time with them. 


College relationships are typically more mature than the relationships you may have had in high school. In college, you have the freedom to date who you want and the ability to hang out with people without parent's opinions or rules about when, where, and how long you can see this person. You will also be less likely to permit petty arguments or miscommunications that you may have with an immature relationship. Your partner will most likely have a different schedule than you and have their own responsibilities, such as school work or if they are a part of a club. This is different from when you were in high school and may have been confined to being in the same school building for eight hours a day every day. A college campus is large, and your classes may be on different sides of the campus or at different times. This makes it unlikely you will run into your partner on your way to class if you go to the same school. If you plan to have a long-distance relationship with your high school partner everything will most likely change. In order for the relationship to work it is going to require effort from both sides and some changes will have to be made.