Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist
Courtney Glashow
Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team. 

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk. 

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families
toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues
couples therapy, hoboken counseling, jersey city therapist, mental health blog, nyc counselor, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

self esteem therapist

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The Stages of Affair Recovery

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The Stages of Affair Recovery

Infidelity is a very challenging obstacle that many couples face. From the emotional turmoil that results from the breach of trust to lingering questions that can trigger anxiety, many couples in this situation are unsure of how to move forward. Despite the immense pain of infidelity, many couples look to rebuild their relationship, showcasing a lot of resilience in the process. In fact, research has shown that roughly 60 to 75% of couples decide to stay together after infidelity. This success rate may be even higher if couples decide to seek the professional support of a couples counselor.

Affair recovery in a couples counseling setting offers a structured, supportive setting for partners to navigate this difficult journey together. Contrary to popular belief, addressing the betrayal is just one small part of the couples therapy journey at Anchor Therapy. It is about getting to the root cause of presenting issues, truly understanding the impact of the infidelity, rebuilding trust, and creating a deeper emotional connection.

In this blog, you will discover how affair recovery counseling can guide you and your significant other through the healing process. From pinpointing underlying concerns to creating an avenue for open communication, you can redefine your relationship with the help of specific tools and strategies so you can grow stronger together.  Whether you are looking for some hope or are ready to dive into the complexities of your relationship, you have come to the right place!

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Career Coaching for Real Estate Agents in Hoboken & Jersey City

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Career Coaching for Real Estate Agents in Hoboken & Jersey City

The real estate markets in Hoboken and Jersey City are very unique given that both are fast-paced cities booming with new opportunities day after day. For real estate agents in this competitive market, standing out from other experts requires more than just hard work- you need to have a sharp strategy and a clear vision for what success is and what success means to you. Career coaching for Hoboken and Jersey City real estate agents can help you unlock your full potential. From understanding hyper-local market trends to creating connections with people in your community, the right career coach at Anchor Therapy will help you build your self-confidence so you can achieve your goals!


Whether you are a new agent or an expert in your professional field, career coaching tailored to your unique needs gives you a specialized blueprint for personal and professional success. Executive career coaches with expertise in the Hoboken and Jersey City markets understand the special challenges and opportunities that these areas offer. Career counseling can help you build your brand while also staying ahead on emerging trends in the real estate market. With the guidance of a career counselor, you can maximize your strengths and overcome obstacles. If you are ready to transform your career in one of New Jersey’s hottest real estate markets, look no further than career coaching at Anchor Therapy!

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How to Thrive with ADD As An Adult

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How to Thrive with ADD As An Adult

Living with Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) as an adult can be challenging. You may feel like you are constantly trying to juggle different responsibilities, deadlines, and relationships which can easily feel overwhelming and stressful. Specific techniques or traditional organizational tools may not work for you as they do not fit your unique way of thinking. With all of that being said, it is 100% possible to live a healthy and fulfilling life as an adult with ADD! By understanding your strengths, learning from your challenges, and creating systems that work for your brain and life, you can unlock your true potential and build a toolkit for success.


In this blog, we will explore practical tips and real-life approaches you can take to help manage the hurdles that come along with ADD. Whether it is sticking to a helpful routine or discovering creative ways to remain motivated, you will feel empowered to harness your energy and resilience. Whether you are newly diagnosed with ADD or have been living with the mental health condition for years, there is no better time to take control of your life and become the best version of yourself!

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3 Benefits of Working With A Depression Therapist

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3 Benefits of Working With A Depression Therapist

Navigating depression is not an easy feat- it can even feel overwhelming and isolating. Depression is not a one-size-fits-all experience. In other words, depression manifests differently for each person. Luckily, with the right self-help strategies and support from loved ones and a professional depression therapist at Anchor Therapy, you can make significant strides in managing your depression. 

Depression therapy gives you a safe space to explore your emotions, comprehend your underlying emotions, and create effective coping strategies tailored to your unique set of needs. Understanding the benefits of depression counseling is the first step to starting your professional mental health care journey. 

A skilled depression counselor works closely with you to offer personalized care by pinpointing triggers, patterns, and the root causes of your internal struggles. At Anchor Therapy, our depression therapists utilize evidence-based techniques to address your unique obstacles, whether through Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT), or more! This type of customized mental health counseling makes sure that you receive practical support as well as structured support that is deeply relevant to your life. 


Working with a depression therapist goes beyond mere symptom management- it is all about creating long-lasting resilience and emotional growth. A depression coach can help you rebuild self-esteem, fortify your relationships, and create better tools to handle future stressors. As you make progress in depression treatment, you will find that you are better equipped to reclaim your happiness and purpose. This alone can make depression therapy a transformative journey worth considering. If you are interested in learning more, continue reading this blog to dive into the three key benefits of working with a depression therapist!

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The Impact of Trauma on LGBTQIA+ Lives

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The Impact of Trauma on LGBTQIA+ Lives

For many people within the LGBTQIA+ community, the journey of identity acceptance is intertwined with unique celebrations and challenges alike. Unfortunately, for many people in the LGBTQIA+ community, trauma is a common experience that ranges from rejection and discrimination to systematic oppression. Every person’s story is different and the impact of trauma can leave great marks on one’s self-esteem, relationships, and overall mental health and well-being. Recognizing how the experiences in your life affected you is the first step to healing.


Trauma in the LGBTQIA+ population is typically rooted in external pressures to conform to the norms of society. Bullying, family rejection, workplace discrimination, and religious condemnation are just some examples of negative LGBTQIA+ experiences that can create deep emotional scars. There are also systemic barriers in place, from exclusion in certain spaces to a lack of access to affirming care, that can worsen these effects. Even microaggressions can create an ongoing sense of alienation. There are very specific challenges at play for marginalized communities, particularly those in the LGBTQIA+ community.


Understanding the impact of trauma on LGBTQIA+ people is important to create a sense of resilience and carve a path to healing. Particularly with LGBTQIA+ youth, only 4% of people in this community reported never having experienced any symptoms of trauma according to the Trevor Project. With a LGBTQIA+ affirming therapist at Anchor Therapy, you both can create a space where you are seen, valued, and safe.

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How to Unlock Emotional Closeness in Your Relationship with An Intimacy Therapist

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How to Unlock Emotional Closeness in Your Relationship with An Intimacy Therapist

In any relationship, emotional closeness is the heartbeat. Many couples struggle to maintain the deep connection they once experienced at the beginning of their relationship as life tends to get in the way. This blockage can lead to feelings of frustration, loneliness, and distance. If you and your partner are in this position, the silver lining is that emotional closeness is not simply something you possess or do not possess. You can view emotional closeness as a skill that can get stronger over time with the right amount of attention and care. One route to this is to work with an intimacy coach who can offer a compassionate, guided way to identify and solve emotional barriers so you and your partner can rediscover the bond that brought you two together in the first place.


Intimacy counseling can provide you with the tools needed to help you and your significant other communicate more openly, create trust, and deepen your understanding of one another. Most times, couples are unaware of the hidden patterns and unspoken fears that dominate their daily conversations and behaviors. Whatever you and your partner are going through, an intimacy counselor is there to create a safe space to explore your challenges. Through this exploration process, you and your significant other can learn to express your emotions without fear of judgment and to build a connection which is rooted in authenticity and empathy.

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How to Use Anxious Attachment Therapy to Build Secure Attachment

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How to Use Anxious Attachment Therapy to Build Secure Attachment

Are you struggling with anxious attachment patterns in your relationships? Do you feel abandoned when you are away from your partner? Do you find yourself needing constant reassurance from other people? How do you feel when a significant other or friend wants some alone time? If you find yourself fearing abandonment, needing constant reassurance, and feeling insecure, you are not alone in your relationship struggles.


An anxious attachment style can deeply impact your emotional welfare and ability to successfully connect with others. With that being said, with the right tools and mindset, you can move towards building a secure attachment style! A secure attachment style refers to a healthy, positive pattern of emotional bonding that occurs in a relationship. It is characterized by trust, comfort with intimacy, and the ability to rely on other people without a fear of rejection or abandonment. Specifically, with therapy for an anxious attachment style at Anchor Therapy, you can learn how to reframe your anxious thoughts into positive, more realistic ones to build better connections in your life, whether romantic or platonic!

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Does ADHD Get Better With Age?

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Does ADHD Get Better With Age?

When it comes to Attention-Deficit-Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), many children, teens, and adults may wonder if ADHD challenges will subside with age. Typically, ADHD is associated with children and teens who struggle with focus, impulsivity, and hyperactivity. For more information, read our blog “Parenting A Child With ADHD.” But did you know that ADHD can impact adults as well? To learn more information on this topic, check out our blog “CBT for Adult ADHD.”


ADHD is a lifelong neurodevelopmental condition which means that symptoms can persist into adulthood; however, ADHD symptoms may manifest differently over time. As you grow older, you will often develop healthy coping strategies and skills which can help you manage your ADHD symptoms more effectively. 


For example, as an adult with ADHD you may face less issues surrounding hyperactivity and more concern over focus and organization. Life transitions,career paths, and other environmental factors can influence how ADHD symptoms present over time. That is to say, while ADHD never fully goes away, it can look different and feel more manageable as you get older.

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Are Dating Apps Bad For Your Mental Health?

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Are Dating Apps Bad For Your Mental Health?

In today’s world, dating apps have become commonplace. They have become the standard way to meet people and connect, offering access to thousands of potential romantic partners with a simple swipe or tap. There is no denying the convenience of these apps and how easy they make it to meet new people and expand your social circle, but have you ever wondered how online dating can impact your mental health? Do dating apps actually help people find meaningful connections? Do dating apps leave you feeling more isolated than before? More anxious? More dissatisfied?


In this blog, we will explore the complex impact of dating apps on one’s mental health, analyzing both the excitement they offer and the emotional toll they can take. Whether you are an avid user of dating apps or utilize them reluctantly, it is important to understand how online dating can impact your self-esteem, relationships, self-confidence, and overall happiness.