Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist
Courtney Glashow
Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team. 

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk. 

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families
toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues
couples therapy, hoboken counseling, jersey city therapist, mental health blog, nyc counselor, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

teen counseling nj

, , , , ,

Does ADHD Get Better With Age?

, , , , ,
Does ADHD Get Better With Age?

When it comes to Attention-Deficit-Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), many children, teens, and adults may wonder if ADHD challenges will subside with age. Typically, ADHD is associated with children and teens who struggle with focus, impulsivity, and hyperactivity. For more information, read our blog “Parenting A Child With ADHD.” But did you know that ADHD can impact adults as well? To learn more information on this topic, check out our blog “CBT for Adult ADHD.”


ADHD is a lifelong neurodevelopmental condition which means that symptoms can persist into adulthood; however, ADHD symptoms may manifest differently over time. As you grow older, you will often develop healthy coping strategies and skills which can help you manage your ADHD symptoms more effectively. 


For example, as an adult with ADHD you may face less issues surrounding hyperactivity and more concern over focus and organization. Life transitions,career paths, and other environmental factors can influence how ADHD symptoms present over time. That is to say, while ADHD never fully goes away, it can look different and feel more manageable as you get older.

, , , ,

Why Do I Have Control Issues?

, , , ,
Why Do I Have Control Issues?

At one point or another, everyone has struggled with control in some way shape or form. Perhaps you try to take control over a romantic relationship so you do not let emotions cloud your judgment. Maybe your control issues really come to the surface at work where you compete with your peers. Past experiences or a fear of uncertainty commonly drive control concerns. You may have a deep-seated belief that being in control equates to safety and stability. 


Continue reading this blog if you want to explore the root causes of control issues, learn how control concerns manifest in your behaviors and relationships, and, most importantly, to see what coping strategies can be implemented in your life to regain a sense of balance and flexibility. When you understand the underlying motivations of your control issues, you can take healthier actions to better yourself which will also better the interactions you have with other people. This will ultimately lead to a more fulfilling, happier life. 

, , , , ,

How to Break the Cycle of Obsessive Thoughts

, , , , ,
How to Break the Cycle of Obsessive Thoughts

Have you ever experienced the same thoughts over and over again? Do you dwell on these thoughts, and the negative feelings that come along with it? The repetitive, often negative aspect of thought rumination can contribute to feelings of anxiety and depression, as well as worsen existing conditions.


Rumination is when you feel stuck in a cycle of negative thoughts. Rumination is an obsessive form of thinking that includes excessive, repetitive thoughts or themes that conflict with other mental activity, according to the American Psychological Association (APA). Although thought rumination typically occurs for individuals with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) or Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), anyone can struggle with obsessive thinking. 


Rumination can transform worry into a habit or a way of life. Obsessive thinking can be a hard cycle to break, but it is possible! Continue reading this blog to learn how to break the cycle of obsessive thoughts.

, , , , ,

5 Emotional Effects of a Hurricane

, , , , ,
5 Emotional Effects of a Hurricane

Hurricanes are often known for their physical destruction. When you think of a hurricane, it is likely that some powerful images come to your mind- torrential rains, powerful winds, and surging water. However, what is not talked about as much is the emotional impact of a hurricane which can be just as overwhelming as the physical effects. 


The devastation brought by recent storms, such as Hurricane Milton and Hurricane Helene, extend beyond just the physical wreckage left behind. When going through a natural disaster, it is likely that you are experiencing a whirlwind of emotions, from anxiety and fear to grief and helplessness. 


In the immediate aftermath of a hurricane, you are likely dealing with a lot of things, from the chaos and uncertainty surrounding evacuations to property damage. This sort of disruption in your life can leave you feeling vulnerable and emotionally exhausted. 


Going through a natural disaster once may leave you wondering when the next one will strike. This heightened fear can lead to more stress, insomnia, and even Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, or PTSD. The experience of living through and surviving a hurricane can challenge your sense of safety, creating emotional scars that require mental health healing.

, , , , , , , ,

5 Different Types Of Play Therapy And How They Can Help Your Child

, , , , , , , ,
5 Different Types Of Play Therapy And How They Can Help Your Child

Finding the right therapy that works for your child or teen can be tricky. Every child is unique and may have different goals, attention spans, and levels of maturity. Children may complain about going to therapy because they may not fully understand how it can help them - or they may not realize that they need help at all. As their parent, all you want to do is get your child the help they need. Kids like to engage in things that entertain them. Children can have short attention spans and it can be hard to keep them focused. Introversion and shyness is another thing that many adolescents may struggle with. 

Therapy can help with things like developing coping skills, communication tactics, realistic life goals, and helping you to achieve the best version of yourself. When a child is going through a negative feeling, experience, and/or mindset they may not even fully understand that they’re being negatively affected. Therapy can help your child in many different ways.

, , , , , , , , , , ,

How To Support Your Teen Through High School and College Application Anxiety

, , , , , , , , , , ,
How To Support Your Teen Through High School and College Application Anxiety

The season of high school and college acceptances is upon us. By this time of the year, most students have an idea of where they will be heading in the fall whether it is a great magnet high school or a dream college a plane ride away. In a few weeks, students will sigh a final breath of relief when they commit to a school but, in the meantime, these last few moments of indecision can be painful and anxiety-ridden. Additionally, some teens and young adults may be grappling with the sting of rejection, forcing them to rethink their entire futures. 


The impact of your child’s stress during this entire process should not be overlooked. This process can also be grueling for you as a parent. You may be going through the ups and downs of the high school and college admissions process with your child as the acceptances, rejections, and waitlists roll in. When your teen is accepted, feelings of joy and excitement may overcome them. On the other hand, if your child is rejected, or even waitlisted, they may be completely and utterly devastated, especially if they are denied from their dream high school or college. This experience undeniably plays a role in your teen’s mental health.

, , , , ,

Anger Management Counseling for Teens

, , , , ,
Anger Management Counseling for Teens

Does your teen blow up at any mention of rules and structure? Do you feel like you have to walk on eggshells in your own home? If this resonates with you, you are not alone. The teenage years can be turbulent times. Your teen is going through a lot, trying to figure out their place in the world and what their next steps are as they transition into adulthood.

It is typical for teens to desire more freedom as they get older. You may find that your teen is pushing boundaries which is normal but, in some cases, it can spiral out of control. Anger itself is not a problem as anger is a normal emotion. Instead, your teen may not be able to manage their emotions, including anger, well which is an issue.

Anger can build up over time if someone is passive or does not establish clear boundaries. This may lead to your teen going from 0 to 100 and lashing out on you and other family members. How people react with anger can reveal a lot about their emotional well-being.

, , , , , , ,

What We Learned About Family Dynamics From Netflix’s Ginny and Georgia

, , , , , , ,
What We Learned About Family Dynamics From Netflix’s Ginny and Georgia

Every family has their own unique way of living and interacting with one another. Certain circumstances can switch up family dynamics, such as a family member going through a struggle or a change in financial status. The way families are created and composed varies and the types of families we see are always changing. 

No matter the type of family, communication is key to establishing a healthy relationship. Sometimes this communication can come naturally while other times families may need some help from an outside source and possibly choose to attend marriage and family therapy. One television show that exhibits family dynamics is the Netflix hit Ginny & Georgia.

, , , , , , ,

Parenting A Child With ADHD

, , , , , , ,
Parenting A Child With ADHD

Life with a child or teenager with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) can be troubling and overwhelming at times. It is not traditional child rearing. Typical rules and household routines can seem impracticable in your situation, depending on your child’s symptoms. Therefore, different approaches may have to be embraced. It can be hard to cope with some of your child’s behaviors, but there are always ways to make improvements and, ultimately, make life for your family easier.

As a parent, you can help your child overcome daily struggles by guiding them on how to channel their energy into positive forces. This step alone will bring greater serenity to your family. The earlier and more consistently you address your child’s issues by seeking the help of a professional, the better off your child will be. If you continue to let the problems linger, it can unfortunately cause bigger problems down the road which will negatively impact your child’s development and delay their mental and behavioral success.

, , , ,

How to Help Your Pre-Teen or Teen Who’s Struggling in School

, , , ,
How to Help Your Pre-Teen or Teen Who’s Struggling in School

No matter how hard you try, your child may struggle at some point in their school career. If your pre-teen or teen is struggling, it does not mean that you are a bad parent or doing anything wrong. Instead, it means that the learning circumstances are different for them than they were for you while you were going through school.

Kids are under more academic demands now more than ever. The learning curve gets steeper as the years progress which lengthens the amount of time students must dedicate to their studies. As your child advances to the next grade each academic year, it is also making subjects more difficult. At that point, research papers, projects, and reports require more planning and time from your children.

When your pre-teen or teen is having a difficult time in school, the stress will inevitably follow them home. Eventually, the extra homework, high stress levels, and anxiety become a stressor for the whole family. If you want to help your child succeed in school, you have come to the right place!