Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist
Courtney Glashow
Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team. 

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk. 

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families
toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues
couples therapy, hoboken counseling, jersey city therapist, mental health blog, nyc counselor, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

relationship anxiety hudson county nj

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Do Long-Distance Relationships Work?

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Do Long-Distance Relationships Work?

Long-distance relationships can be a double-edged sword. On one hand, they offer space for individual growth, and on the other, they come with unique emotional challenges that can take a toll on mental health. Research shows that 60% of long-distance relationships are considered successful in the long run. 


With that being said, couples who are physically separated often face feelings of loneliness, anxiety, and uncertainty. If your communication is not consistent or healthy, these emotions can be exacerbated. So, how can long-distance couples navigate these hurdles? Is it truly possible for long-distance relationships to thrive? In this blog post, we will dive into the different aspects of long-distance relationships, including what can make them work and what can cause them to fail.


Trust, clear communication, and a shared vision for the future are all essential components of a healthy, successful long-distance relationship. As with any relationship, there needs to be a healthy balance between connection and independence. Luckily, there are many mental health strategies that can help you and your partner maintain a strong bond while also caring for one another’s emotional well-being. From coping mechanisms to relationship-building tips, you can learn to make the distance work for you and not against you.

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How to Use Anxious Attachment Therapy to Build Secure Attachment

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How to Use Anxious Attachment Therapy to Build Secure Attachment

Are you struggling with anxious attachment patterns in your relationships? Do you feel abandoned when you are away from your partner? Do you find yourself needing constant reassurance from other people? How do you feel when a significant other or friend wants some alone time? If you find yourself fearing abandonment, needing constant reassurance, and feeling insecure, you are not alone in your relationship struggles.


An anxious attachment style can deeply impact your emotional welfare and ability to successfully connect with others. With that being said, with the right tools and mindset, you can move towards building a secure attachment style! A secure attachment style refers to a healthy, positive pattern of emotional bonding that occurs in a relationship. It is characterized by trust, comfort with intimacy, and the ability to rely on other people without a fear of rejection or abandonment. Specifically, with therapy for an anxious attachment style at Anchor Therapy, you can learn how to reframe your anxious thoughts into positive, more realistic ones to build better connections in your life, whether romantic or platonic!

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Swipe Smart: Navigating Online Dating and Mental Health with Dating Therapy

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Swipe Smart: Navigating Online Dating and Mental Health with Dating Therapy

In a world of swiping left and right on dating apps, it is easy to think that the love of your life could be right at your fingertips. However, if you are someone who is on a dating app, you may have found out the reality that it is not that easy to find your person whether you are looking for something casual, a short-term relationship, or your forever partner.

In other words, modern dating presents its fair share of challenges. There are the practical challenges, such as cycling through the various dating apps, finding compatible people in your area, and carving out the time in your schedule to genuinely connect with others. Then, there are the more emotionally-charged problems, like ghosting, love bombing, and even seeing things take a turn for the ugly when you reject a person.

Instead of waiting around for Mr. Right or Mrs. Right, you can take control of your happiness now by meeting with a dating therapist and continuing to read this helpful blog!

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4 Ways to Manage Your Relationship Anxiety

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4 Ways to Manage Your Relationship Anxiety

Relationship anxiety can simply be defined as feelings of insecurity, worry, and doubt about your relationship, making you question your compatibility and future with your partner. Contrary to what you might believe, it is normal to have some level of anxiety about your relationship. You may question your significant other’s past partner or question if your long-term goals match up. But, if your relationship anxiety is beginning to cause severe issues for you, it is a sign that something is off.

Relationship anxiety can become an issue when it interferes with the growth of your relationship or even impacts other areas of your life, such as not being able to concentrate at the office. To help with this, read our blog “3 Ways to Achieve Work-Life Balance.” 

When you are feeling insecure in your relationship, you may feel easily stressed. In other cases, you may have a hard time deciphering your emotions. This inability to process your feelings can have problematic results, like separation anxiety or even burnout for your relationship.