Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist
Courtney Glashow
Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team. 

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk. 

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families
toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues
couples therapy, hoboken counseling, jersey city therapist, mental health blog, nyc counselor, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

anxiety therapist montclair nj

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5 Ways to Start Practicing Mindfulness

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5 Ways to Start Practicing Mindfulness

In today’s world, everyone is constantly on the go. We have certain things that demand our attention, deadlines at work or at school, and other constant streams of distractions, such as social media. Many of us find ourselves living life on autopilot. You may be moving from one task to the next without even realizing it. If this sounds like your life, this is where mindfulness can come into play. Mindfulness is a simple, transformative way of life that invites you to slow down, tune in, and reconnect with the present.

Mindfulness is not about just achieving a peaceful state of mind or escaping the challenges of life- it is about cultivating awareness and acceptance for the present moment, no matter what life throws your way. Whether you are looking to manage stress or simply want to learn how to savor life’s small moments, mindfulness can help you engage with life’s experiences on a deeper level. Research shows that mindfulness can reduce stress by 31%.

If you have been curious about starting your journey with mindfulness but are not sure where to begin, you are in the right place! Whether you are a complete beginner or you are looking to refresh your mindfulness practice, keep reading this blog to find approachable ways to integrate mindfulness into your daily routine.

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4 Ways to Deal with Election Anxiety in 2024

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4 Ways to Deal with Election Anxiety in 2024

Every four years, we get the opportunity to head to the polls and put action behind our voices in choosing the next President of the United States. If it feels like there is a lot of pressure on your shoulders (and your vote), you are not alone. You are making a major decision about the future of your country. What do you want your nation to look like? Do social issues trump financial concerns for you, or vice versa? What is your definition of an ‘ideal America’?

From ongoing political commentary to ruthless banter on social media, it can sometimes be hard to clarify your own values and goals amongst all the noise. If you are feeling anxious about the 2024 United States Presidential Election, you are not the only one. According to the American Psychiatric Association, 73% of United States adults are anxious about the election on top of additional life transitions.

The good news is that, even after the election comes and goes, the world will continue spinning. Your world will continue- you will go to school and/or work, take care of your children and family members, hang out with friends, and so on. But, in the meantime, it is important to reclaim your happiness and peace so your election anxiety does not get the best of you.

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Do I Have Anxiety? Take the Quiz and Learn 5 Instant Calming Tips

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Do I Have Anxiety? Take the Quiz and Learn 5 Instant Calming Tips

Anxiety is a normal human emotion despite what you may think about it. When you are not sure about what is going to happen over the next few minutes, days, or months, you may react to uncertainty with anxiety. 

Simply put, anxiety is a worry over a potential threat in your future. You may lie awake late at night wondering if your date is going to text you back. Pondering an uncomfortable conversation with a loved one may leave your stomach in knots days before the discussion even takes place. Before getting on a plane to travel for vacation, your heart may begin to race. If you struggle with plane anxiety, check out our blog “8 Tips To Overcome Flight Anxiety.”

It is our human nature to want to get rid of these uncomfortable feelings and sensations as soon as possible; however, pushing them away may worsen your anxiety-related symptoms. Worrying about getting rid of your anxiety tells your nervous system that there is another thing to be anxious about, creating a loop where your anxiety is just made worse. Long-lasting anxiety that interferes with your day-to-day life may signal an anxiety disorder which requires the support of an anxiety therapist. 

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Why Do I Get Anxiety In The Summer?

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Why Do I Get Anxiety In The Summer?

As many of us know, weather and the changing of seasons can certainly affect our mood. Dark skies and cold temperatures that plague the winter doom can trigger Seasonal Affective Disorder, also known as SAD, and depression. If you are struggling with this, check out our blog “What is Seasonal Affective Disorder and How Is It Treated?”. 

While many people, especially children and teens, look forward to the summer months, warm weather can negatively affect people too. Summer anxiety is a major issue that many people can deal with. By working with an anxiety therapist at Anchor Therapy, you can overcome your anxious thoughts and make the most out of your summer!

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6 Ways to Understand and Support a Parent With Mental Illness

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6 Ways to Understand and Support a Parent With Mental Illness

Mental Illness is something that is still extremely stigmatized and misunderstood. This could be because people aren’t educated and aware of how certain mental disorders function. It’s understandable though, in the sense that it’s hard to understand mental illness when we may not experience it ourselves. Even though you may not be able to empathize with certain mental illnesses and disorders, you can still try your best to understand them. Awareness is extremely important! 

Parents can already be hard to understand from the point of view of a child - even if you’re a teen or an adult. On top of that, parental mental illness can be incredibly challenging to navigate. Mental illness sometimes can get in the way of the proper parenting that a child needs - even if unintentionally. Connecting with a parent and trying to understand the hows and whys of their behavior can really make the home environment more comfortable.

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How Childhood Trauma Can Cause Anxiety, Depression, & PTSD

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How Childhood Trauma Can Cause Anxiety, Depression, & PTSD

Childhood trauma can have a long lasting impact on people. If you suffer from childhood trauma, you may be more at risk for developing anxiety, depression, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), and other mental disorders. By unpacking your trauma with a trauma therapist or anxiety counselor, you'll be able to process those memories and emotions, and feel like your best self again!

What Is Childhood Trauma?

Childhood trauma is the experience of an event by a child or teen that is emotionally painful or distressful, which often results in lasting mental and physical effects. Childhood trauma can occur when a child witnesses or experiences overwhelming negative events in childhood. Children are too young to process events they experienced which causes them to repress, or bury, the memory.

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3 Ways to Manage Your Physical Anxiety Symptoms

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3 Ways to Manage Your Physical Anxiety Symptoms

If you have anxiety, you know what it feels like to be worried, nervous, and/or afraid about typical everyday events. Your anxiety can feel upsetting and difficult to manage. Anxiety can make your life a daily struggle, and may even leave you questioning many things- from your safety to your own anxiety symptoms. 

Oftentimes, anxiety can physically manifest in your body. Many people may think that they are being dramatic or simply imagining the physical symptoms of anxiety, but they are 100% real. Some people with anxiety may experience physical symptoms while others may not. 

Think back to a time where you felt nervous. Perhaps you were preparing for a big presentation at work and you noticed that your palms started to sweat and your legs felt shaky. Maybe you were preparing for a first date, and started to experience some dating anxiety. You may have begun to feel sick to your stomach and experienced an increased heart rate. You might have linked these physical symptoms to nervousness, but were unsure of the exact reason as to why you did not feel good.

Most people will experience anxiety on occasion; however, if you have an anxiety disorder, these feelings and symptoms may be the norm for you.