Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist
Courtney Glashow
Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team. 

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk. 

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families
toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues
couples therapy, hoboken counseling, jersey city therapist, mental health blog, nyc counselor, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

relationship therapist jersey city nj

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5 Ways to Start Practicing Mindfulness

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5 Ways to Start Practicing Mindfulness

In today’s world, everyone is constantly on the go. We have certain things that demand our attention, deadlines at work or at school, and other constant streams of distractions, such as social media. Many of us find ourselves living life on autopilot. You may be moving from one task to the next without even realizing it. If this sounds like your life, this is where mindfulness can come into play. Mindfulness is a simple, transformative way of life that invites you to slow down, tune in, and reconnect with the present.

Mindfulness is not about just achieving a peaceful state of mind or escaping the challenges of life- it is about cultivating awareness and acceptance for the present moment, no matter what life throws your way. Whether you are looking to manage stress or simply want to learn how to savor life’s small moments, mindfulness can help you engage with life’s experiences on a deeper level. Research shows that mindfulness can reduce stress by 31%.

If you have been curious about starting your journey with mindfulness but are not sure where to begin, you are in the right place! Whether you are a complete beginner or you are looking to refresh your mindfulness practice, keep reading this blog to find approachable ways to integrate mindfulness into your daily routine.

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3 Benefits of Working With A Depression Therapist

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3 Benefits of Working With A Depression Therapist

Navigating depression is not an easy feat- it can even feel overwhelming and isolating. Depression is not a one-size-fits-all experience. In other words, depression manifests differently for each person. Luckily, with the right self-help strategies and support from loved ones and a professional depression therapist at Anchor Therapy, you can make significant strides in managing your depression. 

Depression therapy gives you a safe space to explore your emotions, comprehend your underlying emotions, and create effective coping strategies tailored to your unique set of needs. Understanding the benefits of depression counseling is the first step to starting your professional mental health care journey. 

A skilled depression counselor works closely with you to offer personalized care by pinpointing triggers, patterns, and the root causes of your internal struggles. At Anchor Therapy, our depression therapists utilize evidence-based techniques to address your unique obstacles, whether through Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT), or more! This type of customized mental health counseling makes sure that you receive practical support as well as structured support that is deeply relevant to your life. 


Working with a depression therapist goes beyond mere symptom management- it is all about creating long-lasting resilience and emotional growth. A depression coach can help you rebuild self-esteem, fortify your relationships, and create better tools to handle future stressors. As you make progress in depression treatment, you will find that you are better equipped to reclaim your happiness and purpose. This alone can make depression therapy a transformative journey worth considering. If you are interested in learning more, continue reading this blog to dive into the three key benefits of working with a depression therapist!

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Are Empaths Real?

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Are Empaths Real?

In recent years, a certain group of people known as “empaths” have gained a lot of attention. From social media awareness to the publishing of new books, the term “empaths” has gained a lot of traction. Empaths are said to be people with an extraordinary ability to sense or even absorb the emotions, energies, and moods of other people, experiencing these things as if they were their own. While most people are able to feel and showcase empathy, the heightened sensitivity that empaths have goes beyond normal measure. So the question begs- are empaths real?


The idea of empaths usually comes with much debate and contention, from scientists to conversations around popular culture. Some people may see being an empath as a unique personality trait. Some view it as an extension of deep emotional intelligence. Other people view it as an almost psychic six sense where empaths can tune into energies that most people would not even perceive. Regardless of which side you lean on, empaths do report intense emotional experiences that come to shape their day-to-day functioning and relationships with other people.

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Does ADHD Get Better With Age?

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Does ADHD Get Better With Age?

When it comes to Attention-Deficit-Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), many children, teens, and adults may wonder if ADHD challenges will subside with age. Typically, ADHD is associated with children and teens who struggle with focus, impulsivity, and hyperactivity. For more information, read our blog “Parenting A Child With ADHD.” But did you know that ADHD can impact adults as well? To learn more information on this topic, check out our blog “CBT for Adult ADHD.”


ADHD is a lifelong neurodevelopmental condition which means that symptoms can persist into adulthood; however, ADHD symptoms may manifest differently over time. As you grow older, you will often develop healthy coping strategies and skills which can help you manage your ADHD symptoms more effectively. 


For example, as an adult with ADHD you may face less issues surrounding hyperactivity and more concern over focus and organization. Life transitions,career paths, and other environmental factors can influence how ADHD symptoms present over time. That is to say, while ADHD never fully goes away, it can look different and feel more manageable as you get older.

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How to Navigate Insecurity After Infidelity

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How to Navigate Insecurity After Infidelity

Infidelities, affairs, and cheating can erode a relationship, the couple as a unit, and the self-esteem of those who have been cheated on. Most people blame themselves for their partner’s decision to be unfaithful.

When you first found out that your partner, fiance, or spouse cheated on you, it was likely a shock to your system. The emotional impact of infidelity can carry long-term consequences and even disrupt your view of yourself and the world around you. You may think that you are less-than or that no one should be trusted moving forward.

You once felt safe and loved and, now, that image has disappeared. So, what else in your life could change? Infidelity can be damaging, but it can also provide an opportunity for personal growth. 

If you decide to stay with your partner, it can be a chance to strengthen your relationship and fix the cracks. If you decide to leave your partner, you may find yourself increasing your dating standards. There is no right or wrong answer here- you ultimately know what is best for you. Regardless of your situation, you can take certain steps to overcome the insecurities you are facing post-infidelity.

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Embracing Independence: Tools for Overcoming Dependency

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Embracing Independence: Tools for Overcoming Dependency

Codependency refers to an unhealthy relationship dynamic where one person is the “giver” while the other person is the “taker.” The “giver” gives up their own needs and sense of welfare to please their partner. It is important to note that codependency does not just occur in romantic relationships, it can occur in other dynamics as well, including familial connections. Think of parent and child relationships and connections with friends.

Codependency can be a learned behavior that is passed down from one generation to another. For instance, your parents may have been in and modeled a codependent relationship and you learned that is the way to form a romantic connection. Codependency is a behavioral and emotional condition that impacts your ability to foster a healthy, satisfying connection with another person. 

People often refer to codependency as a relationship addiction. People who struggle with codependency often form or maintain relationships that are one-sided, emotionally destructive, and even abusive in some cases.