Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist
Courtney Glashow
Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team. 

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk. 

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families
toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues
couples therapy, hoboken counseling, jersey city therapist, mental health blog, nyc counselor, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

cbt therapist nyc

, , , ,

What Is It Like Being The Golden Child?

, , , ,
What Is It Like Being The Golden Child?

If you are the golden child in your family, chances are that you feel like you are living in a spotlight- always praised, always expected to succeed, and often held up as the example for others to follow, especially siblings. Parents, teachers, and even extended family members may shower you with admiration, reinforcing a sense of confidence and achievement. To learn more about your sense of self-confidence, check out our blog “The Ultimate Guide to Building Self-Confidence.” Knowing that your accomplishments are met with pride and celebration can be very validating and keep you in a loop of wanting to seek constant approval from other people. At times, you may even feel like you can do no wrong in the eyes of others. You may find that your mistakes are overlooked or easily forgiven. 


However, the role of the golden child is not always as perfect as it seems. The pressure to maintain high expectations can be overwhelming, leading to feelings of anxiety, imposter syndrome, or fear of failure. You might feel like your worth is tied solely to your achievements, making it difficult to express vulnerability or make mistakes without disappointing others. Additionally, relationships with siblings can be strained as they may resent the preferential treatment you receive. Being the golden child can be both a privilege and a burden, shaping your self-worth and family dynamics in ways that are not always obvious at first glance. If you resonate with being a golden child, keep reading this blog.

, , , ,

What is the mind-gut connection?

, , , ,
What is the mind-gut connection?

The mind-gut connection is a powerful and often overlooked link between our brain and digestive system. In fact, more and more research comes out every year on how the gut is an active player in our emotional and mental health. In fact, research shows that some gut microbiota (also known as microorganisms) were connected to some mental health disorders, such as anxiety, depression, anorexia nervosa, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), and more. This connection is largely driven by the vagus nerve, which links the brain to the gut, enabling communication between the two. The gut is home to trillions of bacteria, known as the gut microbiome, which influence a variety of bodily functions, including digestion, immunity, and even mood regulation. Check out our blog “How to Regulate Your Emotions.”


The mind-gut connection works both ways, meaning that what we think and feel can also impact our digestive health. For example, when we experience stress or anxiety, our body releases hormones like cortisol, which can affect gut function and lead to digestive issues such as bloating, Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS), or even stomach ulcers. On the other hand, a healthy gut can promote positive mental health, enhancing mood and reducing stress. If you struggle with stress, read our blog “Everything You Need to Know About Stress Management Therapy.” Understanding the intricate relationship between our brain and gut is a crucial step toward achieving overall wellness since both physical and mental health are deeply intertwined.

, , , , , ,

Why do I feel addicted to love?

, , , , , ,
Why do I feel addicted to love?

Love is a powerful emotion. It can sweep you off of your feet, feel euphoric, and be a source of immense happiness. However, when love starts to feel like an obsession or dependency, it may hint that there is a deeper issue going on. The sense of being “addicted” to love often comes from your brain’s response to the emotional highs of being in a romantic connection with someone. When you fall in love, your brain releases a host of feel-good chemicals, such as dopamine, oxytocin, and serotonin. These chemicals can create a sense of pleasure and attachment. Over time, you may become dependent on these neurochemical ‘boosts’. In other words, your association of love to intense feelings of validation and joy makes you crave love even more.


There is a point in time where a longing for love can become too intense and turn into emotional dependency. Some signs of this may be constantly seeking external validation  or falling into unhealthy cycles of emotional highs and lows with someone, even if it is a toxic connection. For more information on this, check out our blog “How To Tell If You Are In A Toxic Relationship.” The desire to feel loved, cherished, or wanted is at the core of the human experience, but it may cloud your sense of self-worth over time. Not being in a romantic relationship should not make you feel incomplete. Understanding why love feels like an addiction and your relationship to love is the first step toward breaking free from unhealthy patterns and learning how to nurture healthier, more balanced relationships.

, , ,

What do maladaptive daydreams look like?

, , ,
What do maladaptive daydreams look like?

Maladaptive daydreaming refers to a pattern of extensive, vivid daydreaming that interferes with daily life. Maladaptive daydreaming often becomes a form of escapism. Unlike normal daydreaming, which may occur occasionally and does not really disrupt functioning, maladaptive daydreaming can become all-consuming. 

People experiencing maladaptive daydreaming may spend hours each day lost in elaborate fantasies, often centered around idealized scenarios or intricate narratives that they mentally replay. These daydreams can be triggered by external events, emotions, or boredom, and they often involve highly detailed storylines with characters, settings, and even specific events. As these fantasies grow, they can take on a life of their own, making it difficult for individuals to focus on real-world tasks or engage meaningfully with other people to foster relationships.

While daydreaming itself is not inherently harmful, maladaptive daydreaming can have significant negative consequences. People who struggle with this type of daydreaming may experience difficulty concentrating on work or school, neglect relationships, or feel disconnected from their surroundings. These daydreams often create a sense of temporary relief from life's stresses, but they can ultimately cause more issues in the long-run, preventing individuals from addressing the real challenges they face. As the fantasies become more compelling and immersive, the boundary between fantasy and reality can blur which can lead to feelings of isolation, frustration, and even depression. For more information, check out our blog “3 Benefits of Working with a Depression Therapist.”

Understanding maladaptive daydreaming is crucial in order to address it effectively and find healthier ways to cope with stress and emotions.

, , , , ,

How to Get Past Medical Trauma

, , , , ,
How to Get Past Medical Trauma

Healing from past medical trauma can feel like an overwhelming journey, but it is possible to regain control and peace with the right therapeutic approach. Medical trauma can come in many forms whether it is from a difficult diagnosis, a painful procedure, or generally negative healthcare experiences. Medical trauma typically leaves long-lasting, deep emotional scars that impact your level of trust in doctors, health decisions, and overall welfare. Over time, these wounds can manifest as anxiety, fear, or even physical symptoms, making it important to recognize the impact of these experiences and seek ways to move forward. If you struggle with physical mental health symptoms, check out our blog “3 Ways to Manage Your Physical Anxiety Symptoms.” 


Taking steps toward healing involves acknowledging the trauma, seeking mental health support from a licensed psychotherapist, and building healthier coping mechanisms. Whether through mental health counseling at Anchor Therapy, mindfulness, or support groups, addressing these emotional wounds allows you to reclaim your sense of self and find comfort in your healthcare journey again. With patience and care, it is possible to navigate the healing process and transform past medical experiences into sources of strength and resilience!

, , , , , ,

Your Guide to Natural Treatment for OCD

, , , , , ,
Your Guide to Natural Treatment for OCD

Living with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) can feel overwhelming to say the least. Research from the International OCD Foundation shows that about 1 in 40 adults have OCD or will develop it at some point in their lives. This translates to roughly 8.2 million adults living with OCD in the United States. Luckily, natural treatment options are available which can provide hope when it comes to managing your OCD-related symptoms. While traditional treatments like medication exist, some clients may seek complementary services to enhance their mental health healing journey. In this blog, we will look at natural approaches to bettering your mental and emotional health through lifestyle adjustments, mindfulness practices, and mental health counseling. These methods will equip you with tools to lessen anxiety, interrupt obsessive patterns, and give you a greater sense of control over your life.


Whether you are looking to complement a traditional treatment option or explore standalone options, your OCD treatment plan should always meet you where you are at. From adequate sleep to mindfulness techniques like meditation and grounding exercises, natural strategies can play a key role in helping you manage your OCD symptoms. Let us dive into a practical look at how natural remedies can help with your OCD!

, , , , , ,

Your Guide to Panic Attack Treatment

, , , , , ,
Your Guide to Panic Attack Treatment

Living with panic attacks can feel all-consuming and unpredictable. When is one going to occur? What symptoms are going to pop up? You may feel uncertain about what lies ahead and constantly caught off guard by your nervous system. Panic attacks are intense episodes of fear that come with no warning. Therefore, even doing a mundane errand can seem daunting when you live in constant fear of having a panic attack. The silver lining here is that you do not have to face this mental health challenge alone! There are effective therapeutic options to help manage your panic attacks so you can regain control over your life. Whether you struggle with the occasional panic attack or struggle with Panic Disorder, knowing your treatment options is the first step toward recovery.


In this blog, we will explore many pathways to treating panic attacks, from quick de-escalation tips to therapeutic interventions. Hopefully, demystifying panic attack treatment options can empower you to make informed decisions about your mental health. Together with a therapist for panic attacks at Anchor Therapy, you can work collaboratively to replace fear with resilience!

, , , , ,

3 Benefits of Working With A Depression Therapist

, , , , ,
3 Benefits of Working With A Depression Therapist

Navigating depression is not an easy feat- it can even feel overwhelming and isolating. Depression is not a one-size-fits-all experience. In other words, depression manifests differently for each person. Luckily, with the right self-help strategies and support from loved ones and a professional depression therapist at Anchor Therapy, you can make significant strides in managing your depression. 

Depression therapy gives you a safe space to explore your emotions, comprehend your underlying emotions, and create effective coping strategies tailored to your unique set of needs. Understanding the benefits of depression counseling is the first step to starting your professional mental health care journey. 

A skilled depression counselor works closely with you to offer personalized care by pinpointing triggers, patterns, and the root causes of your internal struggles. At Anchor Therapy, our depression therapists utilize evidence-based techniques to address your unique obstacles, whether through Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT), or more! This type of customized mental health counseling makes sure that you receive practical support as well as structured support that is deeply relevant to your life. 


Working with a depression therapist goes beyond mere symptom management- it is all about creating long-lasting resilience and emotional growth. A depression coach can help you rebuild self-esteem, fortify your relationships, and create better tools to handle future stressors. As you make progress in depression treatment, you will find that you are better equipped to reclaim your happiness and purpose. This alone can make depression therapy a transformative journey worth considering. If you are interested in learning more, continue reading this blog to dive into the three key benefits of working with a depression therapist!

, , ,

What conditions may be treated with CBT therapy near me?

, , ,
What conditions may be treated with CBT therapy near me?

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, often simply referred to as CBT, is a type of structured talk therapy that is structured and goal-oriented. Mental health professionals, from psychologists to psychotherapists and counselors, use CBT to treat or manage a range of mental health conditions and/or emotional concerns. 


If you are someone who is starting off in your journey of trying to find a therapist near you, you likely have come across CBT therapy. For support in this journey, read “How to Find the Best Therapist Near Me.” CBT is often referred to as the gold standard of mental health counseling as it is one of the most common and best-studied forms of mental health therapy.

, ,

7 Stress Management Tools From a Licensed Therapist

, ,
7 Stress Management Tools From a Licensed Therapist

Stress is an inevitable part of life, stemming from various sources such as work, relationships, PTSD and mental health issues and other personal challenges. While some stress can be beneficial, pushing us to perform better and adapt to new situations, chronic stress can have detrimental effects on our physical and mental health. Therefore, effective stress management tools are essential for maintaining overall well-being. This blog explores several proven techniques and strategies to manage stress effectively.

, , ,

4 Ways To Build A Habit That Sticks

, , ,
4 Ways To Build A Habit That Sticks

The process of building a habit, also referred to as habit formation, is a journey where our behaviors become automatic. Habits can be formed consciously or unconsciously. For example, think of when you first wake up in the morning and you go to reach for your phone- this is likely an unconscious habit. On the other hand, your habit of going for a walk every day is a conscious choice you make. 

Habits can be created or erased to suit your needs and, ultimately, to help you reach your goals. Habits play an extremely important role in your health and well-being. Staying consistent and committed will help you form new habits regardless of how long the journey itself might take you!

hobokengirl2017 Hoboken-2021-Winner-Decal Hoboken-2022-Winner-Decal Hoboken-2024-Winner-Decal